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In Bars and Clubs, The Key to Picking Up Hot Chicks is Not Picking Them Up

31 Jul

Bars and clubs… where the hottest chicks go. How do you approach them in this most intimidating environment? Answer: Don’t approach ONLY hot chicks.

Let me ask you something. What’s the “3-second rule”?

Easy, right? When you see a hot girl, approach her within 3 seconds.

That’s true, and accurate.

But there’s a deeper meaning. Approach THE FIRST SET (group of people) YOU SEE within 3 seconds, regardless if there’s hot chicks in it or not.

Here’s a story from my own experience that demonstrates this.

Back when I first started learning pickup, one night I went to a loud dance club to practice.

Oh, and by the way, don’t do what I did and practice at night clubs. Practice in lounges and bars where you can actually hear yourself speak. Club game takes a whole different set of skills.

Anyway, big surprise, I wasn’t getting any interest from chicks. One girl outright said, “I’m not interested.”

I was so discouraged. I couldn’t figure out what I did. The entire following week I wracked my brain trying to figure out what I was doing wrong. It wasn’t until I sought out info from wiser guys than me that I finally figured out what happened.

I was only approaching good-looking women.

I didn’t talk to the bouncer, the bartender, any of the guys or unattractive women. As a result, I was probably coming across as on the prowl.

Worse, by the time I approached a hot chick, I was in such a “watching” mind-set (not a “talkative” one) that the approach felt forced. She probably felt a distinct “this guy is hitting on me” feeling.

No wonder I was striking out.

So, the next night I went out to a bar (that had a club attached) and I did the opposite.

To the bartender I said, “Hey, how’s your night going?”

To the bouncer I made sure to give a solid “What’s going on? Have a great night.”

I spoke to guys—who I found to be really cool and a lot easier to start a conversation with than women for some reason.

I spoke to unattractive girls.

EVERYONE.

When I went into the dance club, I didn’t stand on the sidelines to watch. I got on the dance floor and danced. Side note: I found you don’t have to be John Travolta on the dance floor. All you gotta do is move to the rhythm, and smile. And don’t grind on the girls.

When I returned to the bar I felt this incredible surge of confidence. I felt like I owned the place.

Opening hot chicks was now natural and easy. They were just another group of people in the club—no one special. And amazingly they opened up like flowers in sunshine. haha

This taught me, hands down, that the approach begins BEFORE you approach. It begins with how you feel, with your mind-state.

If your mind-state is anxious, people will feel this and be resistant.  If your mind-state is joyful, people will feel this and want to talk with you. How you feel inside ain’t separate from the approach. It’s the secret to it.

That night I number-closed two gorgeous women. One of them asked for my number because she wanted to demonstrate her blow-job skills on me. Um, let me think about that…okay.

The key to picking up chicks isn’t talking only to the hot chicks but talking to EVERYONE. Everyone.  Don’t discriminate. See a group, 3-seconds later you’re talking to them. Doesn’t have to be a long-ass conversation, a “hey, how’s your night going” does wonders.

This can even be practiced outside the club in everyday life, smiling at people, saying hi, making the cashier smile, or whatever.

Anyway, in a bar, I found people actually want to talk with you. It’s a social environment for God’s sakes! But a lot of time people are shy to break the “stranger” barrier, so they’re psyched when you have the balls to do it.

BONUS: when women see all this, they feel a lot safer when you approach them. They see you’re not after them, on the prowl. They see you’re just friendly, people like you, and that you can even get along with other guys. That’s attractive to women. Women are social value seekers, so when you talk to everyone it shows you have social value to offer them.

ANOTHER BONUS: You get in a talkative mood, and you feel like you can talk to anyone.

And check this out. When you do approach the hot chicks it doesn’t have to be fancy. You can say a quick little thing, make them laugh, and walk away. When you see them again, they feel like you’re not a stranger anymore and they’ll open right up.  You’re not a predator trying to get something from them. You’re just outgoing and fun.

Aaaaaand, you’ll look COMPLETELY different from every other guy in there, who’s just standing there gawking at the women.

But let me clarify this super-important point. You’re friendly not just in order to impress chicks and pick them up, but because it’s a blast to meet new, cool people and build a social network. It just so happens that in the process, you’ve also created attraction in women, even before you approached.

The gorgeous Olivia Palermo

 

 

 

 

 
6 Comments

Posted by on July 31, 2012 in A1 Opening, Home

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

6 responses to “In Bars and Clubs, The Key to Picking Up Hot Chicks is Not Picking Them Up

  1. chaka ra

    October 29, 2012 at 12:10 am

    this was very informative

    Like

     
    • renaissan

      October 29, 2012 at 12:25 am

      Thanks man! It seems like such a small thing talking to everyone in a bar and club like bouncers, bartenders… but it makes all the difference in the world. Let me know how things go. And thanks for checking out the blog.

      Like

       
  2. AG-Spear

    July 9, 2014 at 6:32 am

    Hi renaissan,

    that was a very informative article and I’ve made similiar experiences in field. I have also noticed that If Iget blown out by a set and open another set immediately after that by just be social (no matter if it’s a guy group or a group of unattractive females) then the previous girls will often look really surprised and wonder “maybe he’s just being social… hmmm”. It looks like they question their own suspicion. I also found it very easy to open guys and bouncers … like you said you do them a favor. I remember a few weeks ago I opened a guy who was at a night club alone- it turned out he was a cool guy trabelling and he was also familiar with the venusian arts! A few nights later we hit some clubs together as wingmen🙂.

    You mentioned in your post that club game (loud nightclubs) require a different skillset. I’m really curious to hear more about that topic. For me it looks like most of the PUA techniques are designed for quieter lounge type venues, where you can run “verbal game”. But where I live we don’t have many venues like this and most of the girls just go to loud dance clubs. I really have a tough time running game in those type of venues.

    Kind regards
    AG-Spear

    Like

     
    • renaissan

      July 15, 2014 at 5:10 am

      You got it man! And that’s fantastic about approaching everyone, bouncers, unattractive girls, guys. You even got a wingman out of being so friendly. Awesome.

      My first foursome, similar thing happened: Saw a guy talking to a group of women and the women were kinda cold to him. I gave him props afterwards for being friendly. Turns out he was cool and new to town. So, I showed him the best bars, and we ended up meeting two hot chicks we took home that night. You’re so right, it pays to be friendly to everyone!

      As for club game, I’m not a professional. But basically, it’s about getting into the inner-circle of clubs.
      That means making friends with the promoters of a club. And that takes helping him out by bringing a group of girls to a club. Makes him look good.

      Or, on an even more advanced level, it means making friends with the owner of the club.

      What happens then is if you get into the VIP circle of a club, you don’t even have to run “verbal game” anymore. Hot women see you as part of the inner circle. It pumps up your value, makes you stand out from the crowd, and therefore more attractive.

      So, for example, let’s say you’re in a VIP area surrounded by a promoter, the owner, some hot women. Women approach you. If they don’t, the approach will be a warm one. From there all you have to do is be a cool guy, physically escalate, and done deal.

      Again, I don’t have a lot of experience with club game, but the times I’ve gotten in good with the owner of a club, I didn’t even need to cold approach anymore. You’re almost like a celebrity.

      So, club game is more about making connections with the VIP of the club. Again, promoters are easy VIPs to make friends with. Even though they’re not the real VIPs, they have that perception. So, club game’s more about who you’re seen with. Those visuals take the place of “verbal game.”

      I prefer “verbal game” because it’s less about appearances and actually practicing becoming that more excellent guy from the inside out. You know?

      Another great question, though.

      Like

       
  3. AG-Spear

    July 22, 2014 at 3:26 am

    Thank you for sharing your insights about that topic!

    What you described is very similiar to what BradP teaches in his “club game/ crocodile style” product.
    I would also prefer verbal game, because I think it’s a very important basis which requires practice to be mastered. From then I can try to incorporate those advanced strategies. This type of club game seems to be a cool ‘bonus’ once you have mastered the verbal game and have that high value personality. I mean you are doing less work (almost like being lazy ;)) but get very hot girls.

    Like

     
    • renaissan

      July 22, 2014 at 1:48 pm

      Exactly! Club game is like a bonus you can add once the fundamentals are in place. And verbal game is a fundamental of game.

      Brad P was the exact one I learned this technique from. Great call.

      Like

       

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