Ever wondered where to put your hands?
Let’s say you’re standing in a bar talking with a girl. Where do you put your hands? How do you stand?
Put your hands to your sides. If you keep your arms at a 90 degree angle, it looks stiff. If you cross your arms, you block your heart. It’s defensive and closed. If you put your hands in your pocket, that’s also defensive.
However, if you keep your hands to your sides, it looks natural and RELAXED.
Relaxed = confidence.
It might feel uncomfortable having your hands at your sides at first. It’s like you want to do something with your hands. Try this trick.
Press your middle finger and thumb together.
It’s a trick that’s been around for awhile, and it works. It gives your hands something to do. It eliminates any nervous ticks. And it forces you to stand still and calm.
Same thing goes when you hold your drink. It’s not recommended to drink while you’re out approaching. You want your mind to be as clear as possible. Would you play chess when you’re buzzed? But let’s say you do order a beer or a glass of water or something. If you’re standing, how do you hold your drink?
Again, relax your arm. Don’t hold your drink in a way that blocks your heart. And don’t hold your arm at a 90 degree angle. It’s stiff. Hold your drink with your arm extended to your side. It’s more open. It’s relaxed. And you look the opposite of insecure… you look right at home.
When standing, the same idea of relaxation applies. Don’t stand with your weight perfectly distributed on your right and left foot.
This makes you look like a stiff square. Instead, lean most of your weight on one foot, like in the picture below.
Again, it makes you look more natural and relaxed.
I wrote up a post about body language here. I’ve got a lot more tricks and tips there.
But whenever you’re in doubt, remember to relax. Keep your drink and your hands to your sides. When you relax, it makes the woman you’re talking with feel relaxed, too. You can’t seduce her unless she’s relaxed.
This is pickup 101.
Probaby the 1st. thing I learned in pickup years ago was how to hold your drink. Pretty elementary. But do you think that a lot of PUA’s or newbies(even Naturals) don’t get this concept?
Elementary, true. But like my basketball coach always used to tell my basketball team, fundamentals are where it’s at if you want to play solid game.
Besides, I want to share every insight and aha that helped me succeed with women in this blog. This insight, however basic, went super-far in helping me feel more confident approaching women. So, I thought it would be silly not to provide that insight for others guys. It’s great for newbies and great review for veterans, too.
Thanks for the comment, man.
Without a doubt that was my point, that fundamentals are quick to be ignored for the grand stuff
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