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Sex Tips, Part 6: Fingering

fingering-the-birds-out-of-their-nest

I. Fingering the Clit

1. Upper Right Quadrant (i.e. “one o’clock” YOUR–the man’s–perspective) of clit: This is the most sensitive part of the clit. Lightly stroke.

2. Use plenty of lube: A dry finger hurts and doesn’t feel good. Use plenty of lube while stroking her clit.

3. Light pressure: Women prefer lighter stimulation… not hard pressure… especially since the clit is so sensitive.

4. Tease the clit at first: Don’t attack it. Touch, then back off. Touch some more, then back. Or you could do this. Stroke one side. Then the top. Then the bottom. Stroke in circles. Then up and down. Or side to side. In other words, warm her up. When you find a rhythm she’s like “hell yeah!” keep the same rhythm.

5. When you find a rhythm she likes: This is an idea I got from the book “ESO: Extended Sex Orgasm” by Alan and Donna Brauer. Use that rhythm for ten strokes, then relax for two (for example, where you’re not directly on the clit). It increases sexual tension.

II. Fingering the G-Spot

1. Get foreplay and rapport first: Talk and laugh. Kiss. Stroke her skin. Massage her feet. Lick her clit. This relaxes her. If you dive straight for the G-spot, she’ll resist.

2. Use plenty of lube: You can never have too much lube. Also, make sure fingernails are short.

3. Start slow and DON’T attack the G-spot: Finger her a little. Move your fingers around inside her pussy, then take your fingers out. Taking your fingers away makes her crave your fingers more.

4. G-Spot Location: 1″ – 2″ inside. Up toward the sky. When she’s aroused, you know you’ve got it because it feels like a tiny ball or coin. When she’s not aroused, often you won’t be able to feel it. Why does it feel like a ball? It’s where the female prostrate gland is. That’s what the G-spot is.

G-Spot

In women it’s called the “Skene glands.” When a woman gets wet, that’s where the fluid comes from. When you stroke the G-spot, you’ll hear a squishing sound. You’re on the right track. That’s her Skene Glands making more of the liquid. Stroke it enough, liquid bursts out… a squirting orgasm.

It’s not pee. She’ll say she feels like she has to pee while you’re doing it. But the reality is, it’s the same stuff that makes her pussy wet. You can see this when a girl pees after she’s orgasmed. She had held in the ejaculate, and now she’s emptying it. If she doesn’t believe you, have her pee before you stroke the G-spot. If she feels like she has to pee… well, then she’ll know it’s not pee.

5. G-spot technique: Use the two middle fingers. Hand moves up and down. Fingers pull her towards you, like “come here” motion. Do both these movements at the same time. Think of it as tickling the G-spot. Tickle, but a FIRM tickle.

When you hear that sloshing sound, go really fast. Not necessarily hard… though the G-spot can take more pressure than the clit. But quick. Fast and furious. Shouldn’t take too long after that. After she’s come, you can make her come again. And again, and again. Unlike the clit where after she orgasms, it’s too sensitive to be touched again. Not so with the G-spot.

III. Finger the Anus

Ass

1. Knock at her backdoor: While fingering her pussy with one hand, run a finger from your other hand along the rim. Rub lightly in a circular motion.

2. If she doesn’t swat you away: wet your finger and SLOWLY push the tip inside. It’ll prep you for some anal stimulation later…

 
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Posted by on May 24, 2013 in Home, Sex

 

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Sex Tips, Part 5: Licking The Love Button

tumblr_mip3aor4Y21qzlro6o1_500

1. Start slow.

2. Explore her whole pussy first.

clitoris and vagina

Don’t dive into the clitoris right away. Explore her whole vagina first.

Warm her up. Kiss her thighs. Let her feel anticipation and sexual tension. In other words, stimulate her feelings. Her clit is just an appendage.

3. Show you’re excited about going down on her. SHE’LL get excited. No being mechanic about it. Eat with GUSTO. “I love the way you taste.” “Mmmm.” “You have such a gorgeous pussy.” “Fuck! This turns me on so much.” By the way, she’ll be able to tell if you mean it or not. So, mean it. The point is to stimulate her feelings. That’s her biggest sex organ.

4. Lick the clit INdirectly.

Clitoris_anatomy

The clit is like the head of our penis… except there are even MORE nerve endings. Something like 8,000. A little trivia: the upper right quadrant is the most sensitive part.

It’s so sensitive, it can’t always take direct stimulation. Here’s some ideas how to lick INDIRECTLY.

  • circles around the clit
  • lick skin over it
  • suck her clit
  • sandwich clit between labia, move around in a circular motion

Hell yeah!

5. When you find a rhythm she likes, stick to it. Don’t switch speeds or strokes. It’s too erratic and breaks her concentration. I know, you’d think the variety helps. It doesn’t. You want STEADY. The same rhythm over and over. The repetition lets the sexual pleasure build higher and higher and higher in her… until she explodes.

>>> NOTE: If you’re doing all this, the only other thing in the way of her exploding might be her mind. Sometimes her thoughts can get in the way. See? I told you her mind (or feelings) is her most important sex organ. Help her to calm her mind, and relax. That way she can focus on the now and explode. Here are some ideas:

6. Be relaxed yourself. She can pick up on how you feel. If you’re relaxed and enjoying yourself, she can relax and enjoy herself.

7. STOP in the middle of licking her. Seriously. Feel her tits, kiss her. Keeps that human-to-human, emotional connection. And the break might help take a little pressure off her. Then continue where you left off. Added bonus: keeps her guessing what you’re gonna do next. Anticipation and sexual tension baby!

8. Sometimes she gets self-conscious that it’s taking her awhile. Assure her it’s totally normal to take a while, and you ENJOY doing this. It’s not just about pleasing her. You actually LIKE doing this for your own pleasure.

While we’re on the subject, give a woman AT LEAST 15 minutes. Could take shorter, could take longer. Could take shorter if she’s already WAY turned on before you start licking her. Longer if she wasn’t as warmed up yet. Either way, make yourself comfortable. You’re not going anywhere. Enjoy the meal. It’s like boiling a pot of water. It takes a while, but when it boils… watch out.

9. Multitask. Feel her tits while you’re licking her. Doubles the sensations, yes. But also, stimulating her above the waist… shows you’re making love to her as a human being rather than just a clit. Again, adds that emotional element. Keeps her mind on the present moment, feeling the pleasure.

10. After you’ve licked her for a while and gotten her wet… Finger her G-spot.

G spot

Go past the rough part just a little bit. You’ll know when you’ve found it. It can take more pressure than the clit.

Talk about doubling the sensation and keeping her mind on the pleasure. There’s a reason why the rabbit vibrator is so popular. It stimulates her clit and G-spot at the same time.

rabbit vibrator

The “Rabbit.” It stimulates her G-spot and clitoris at the same time. We can learn from the Rabbit.

We’re better than the rabbit, though, and here’s why. Our tongues have a natural wetness that  feels great on her clit. I learned that from my girl, and it was a revelation to me.

And, of course, the human-to-human emotional connection. Can’t get it from a machine. That’s why when you lick her clit, don’t do it like a machine. Make sure to stimulate her mind and feelings, too.

In fact, her feelings and her mind… enjoying yourself, making her feel relaxed and desired… that’s the most important thing to stimulate. Maybe even more than her clit.

 
55 Comments

Posted by on May 16, 2013 in Home, Sex

 

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