This picture is THE secret to success with women. Don’t make your woman #1. Find your mission in life. Make this #1. Don’t make intimacy your priority. Make it your purpose. She’ll guard the intimacy.
Mary Jane wants Spiderman to stay. She’s sad he’s gotta leave for “war” and be a superhero. She tells him all the time, “please don’t go.” He goes anyway. You can tell how disappointed she is.
But can you imagine if Spiderman said, “Actually you’re right. I won’t go. You’re more important than protecting humankind. You’re the most important thing in my life. Who cares if I’m needed. I’m staying here with you.” She might be glad, but she’d probably also feel let down.
You’ll hear a woman say she wants you to make her #1. The irony is she’ll love and admire you more if she’s not. If you make your woman your priority, she’ll feel like you’re dependent on her for your happiness. She’ll feel smothered. She’ll feel she doesn’t really have a man.
I don’t think she would ever admit she doesn’t want to be number one. She’ll complain she wants more of you. But what she really wants is for you to be dedicated to your purpose–and to also love her fully.
You have a gift to give to the world, everyone does. Don’t submit to your woman and kiss her ass. Discover your gift and purpose. Despite her pleas to the contrary, make giving your deepest gift to the world your priority.
I’ve gotta give credit where credit it due. I learned this insight from David Deida. And it changed my life.
We’ll inevitably get this question. “Does this make me look fat?” How do you respond? If you say no, the danger is you enter “supplicating” land. Obviously never ever tell her she looks fat. The best response is to agree… jokingly. “Yeah… I wasn’t going to say anything.” She’ll hit you on the arm. That’s a good thing. Hehe
Yes, to hold a woman that looks like this is every man’s fantasy. But there’s a great lesson here, too. See how Mary-Jane just relaxes and surrenders in Spidey’s arms? Women yearn for this. See how Spidey is like a rock? Solid, strong, still, protective. That’s the role we want to play with women. When we’re strong and able to steer the course of things, whether sexually, financially, emotionally, spiritually, it allows her to let go and relax.