My Routines Collection



    • A1 Open.
      • 1. Direct
      • 2. Indirect
    • A2. Banter/Neg (part 1 of 2)
      • 1. Banter Lines
      • 2. Funny Stories
      • 3. Kino
      • 4. Contingencies
    • A2. DHV (part 2 of 2)
      • 1. Your Passion
      • 2. Observations About Her
      • 3. Super Optional “Bubble Gum” Routines
    • A3. Qualify (part 1 of 3)
      • 1. What’s Beyond Your Looks?
      • 2. Are You Passionate?
      • 3. What Abilities Do You Have?
      • 4. What Interests Do You Have?
    • A3. Statement of Interest (part 2 of 3)
    • A3. Isolate or Number Close (part 3 of 3)
      • 1. Isolation Close
      • 2. Number Close
    • Create an Emotional Connection
    • Setting a Romantic/Sensual Mood
      • 1. Romantic Questions
      • 2. Ross Jeffries’ Patterns
      • 3. Sexual Subjects
    • Going for the Kiss
    • Extract to Seduction Location


PLEEEEEEEASE don’t overload yourself with routines. No, no, no. I have before and it sucks. You just get… Paralysis.

You need six things for an indirect approach to go well.

A reason for talking with her

  1. A reason for talking with her
  2. Banter within your first TWO sentences. Communicates “I’m not trying to get you”
  3. Initiate a topic of conversation that gives value to her
  4. Qualify her.
  5. State your interest in her.
  6. Either isolate her or make plans for a Day 2

The first six things take just a few minutes. Your goal? Qualification. Get her one-on-one as soon as you can. Once you’re one-on-one, take your time. This is where the game is really played. One-on-one, you need three things.

  1. Create an emotional connection
  2. Kiss her… but don’t make-out yet (during Comfort)
  3. Invite her to a “sex location” (C3)

Don’t move to sex too soon. Take a few hours to get to know her. And the kiss is comfort-building. Keep the sexual tension alive by not making out with her yet. The focus is getting to know her, not sex. There’s basically one thing you need once you’re in private with her.

  1. Foreplay and give her orgasms. Alone in private, NOW you can make-out. But still tease her and build anticipation. Seduction happens in the mind. The more she wants it PSYCHOLOGICALLY because she can’t have it all yet, the wetter she becomes. The wetter she becomes before you stick your dick in her, the closer to the edge of orgasm she already is. (S1 – S3 Seduction)

Attract first, create an emotional connection second, and seduce last.

Couple of things before I get to the routines, and how you can fill out this structure.

Have a “reason for talking to her” when you approach. If you don’t have a good reason, she’s gonna wonder “why are you talking to me? What do you want from me?” If you have a good reason (for example, she looked cool and you wanted to say hi), she’ll know WHY you went up to her to talk, and she can relax.

After you banter, appreciate her. Soften the “play fighting” with appreciation. Too much disinterest and you push her away. Too much interest and it’s too close for comfort. Calibrate your disinterest with interest, as well as your interest with disinterest.

Make sure to qualify. If there’s a mistake budding pickup artists make, it’s not to qualify. The funny thing is, qualification is MORE important than all the attract crap. Don’t get me wrong, the attract crap is important, but they’re just stepping stones to get to qualification.

And APPRECIATE her after you’ve qualified her, too. That appreciation is THE bridge to isolating/closing her.

Okay, that’s a lot of stuff, I know. And I started this whole shebang saying don’t overload yourself with routines. And it’s true. So, to start out with, just pick six really quick, simple “gambits” for your attract phase. Again, it’s six things but taken all together, attraction happens fast–a few minutes at most.


  1. a reason for talking with her (i.e. an opener)
  2. a banter line joined with appreciation (do this IMMEDIATELY after your opener–within TWO sentences)
  3. a DHV (statement about–who you are)
  4. a qualifier (question about–who is she?)
  5. a statement of interest
  6. a way to isolate/close her.

Don’t forget to qualify.

If you get to qualification with five different sets in one night, you’ve mastered the attract phase. Now you can move on to practicing comfort. Add three more routines that:

  1. creates an emotional connection
  2. kiss close
  3. extracts her to the seduction location

Practice up until foreplay. Once you get to foreplay, study how to give women orgasms. Take things step by step.

Congrats. You’re a pickup artist to contend with.

Okay, here are some routines to choose from. Remember, just pick ONE from each of the first six categories to start. Once you’ve mastered the attract phase, then you can choose ONE from each of the last categories. Make your life easy. Keep it simple.


A1 OPEN. (Reason for talking with her)

For your opener, you can go either direct or indirect. The indirect openers are a little longer. My personal favorites are direct. Short, sweet, right to the point. Try on different ones for size and see which fits you best.

Again, I’ve given a lot to choose from, but JUST PICK ONE opener. Practice it five times in the mirror, and five times in the field. THEN you can try another opener. Don’t have five different openers, for example, swimming in your head at once. When you see that hot girl you don’t want to be confused. You just want to GO.

1. Direct

  • I. My Personal Favorites
    • I’ve got this rule that whenever I see someone attractive I have to say hi.
    • You look kinda cool, so I just wanted to see what you were like.
    • You look fun/friendly/interesting. I’ve only got a sec, but I wanted to come over and see what you were like.
  • II. Lance Mason’s Openers
    • ::: MOVIE MOMENT ::: (The pauses create a lot of sexual tension)
  1. I saw you over there and… You are really… Really… …. …. Beautiful. I just had to come over and say hi. Who are you?
    • ::: BACK POCKET OPENER :::
  1. Hey, do you have the time (touch her on wrist to stop her from looking at her watch and pivot so you’re standing next to her now)…actually I really came over to flirt with you. Is that bad? (Banter)

2. Indirect

  • I. Style’s Opinion Openers
  1. Hey, let me get your take on something. I’ve only got a sec but I’m trying to give my friend over there advice, but we’re just a bunch of men–so we’re really not qualified to comment on these matters. (She: what’s that?)
  2. Okay, it’s a two-part question. Imagine you’ve been dating this guy for like three months and he doesn’t want you to talk to a male friend of yours. Now you guys are just friends and nothing would ever happen. What’s the appropriate response? (She: I’d probably break up with the guy I’m dating.)
  3. Okay, makes sense. Now what if this guy was someone you used to sleep with? Does that make a difference? (She: Well, I’m friends with some of my exes, but others I can’t be friends with. So, it depends.)
  4. Okay. The reason I ask is my friend has been dating this girl for like three months and she doesn’t want him to talk to a female friend of his. They haven’t seen each other for years and they really are just friends. The problem is if he stops talking to his friend, he’ll resent his girlfriend. But if he continues to talk to his friend, his girlfriend will resent him. (She: Something like that happened to me once…)
  5. Wow, you guys are like from the View. (She: Laughter)
  6. So, how do you all know each other? (She: Response)
  7. I wonder which one of you is the black sheep. (She: Laughter and Response)
  8. Hey, before I go I couldn’t help notice your ring. Do you always wear a ring on that finger?
  9. (go into Rings, neg while doing it, then qualify)
    • ::: CHEATING :::
  1. There was this article in Esquire magazine that asked different people what cheating was. Well, let me ask first. How would you define cheating?
  2. (go around the group)
  3. It’s Fascinating that a basic concept like cheating, everyone’s definition of it is different. My answer is it’s not being honest with the other person. In other words, you could go and have sex with someone else and as long as she’s okay with it, it’s not cheating. If your girlfriend said okay to have sex with her friend, it’s not cheating because you had a mutual agreement. So, cheating is not being honest, being deceptive, and breaking an agreement you had with another person. So, for someone else, just talking to another girl at a party could be cheating, if she didn’t want you to and you had agreed. Or, staying touch with an ex. That’d be cheating if she asked you not to and you said okay.
  • II. Mystery’s Openers
    • ::: OCEAN’S ELEVEN
  1. We’re celebrating like it’s the end of Ocean’s Eleven
    • ::: GIRL FIGHT ::
  1. Hey did you see the fight outside?
  2. Two girls were fighting over this guy. And the two girls that were fighting were both taller than him, it was the craziest thing. One of the girls was being held back by a guy, and I’m not sure if the guy who was holding her back worked there or not, but it was like two against one. The girl who was being held back, her blouse ripped open and her boob popped. Normally I’d be like, “Hey, how YA doing,” (Joey from Friends voice) but in this case (make grossed out face) it was a saggy, baggy boobie, like from National Geographic. It was just wrong.
  3. Anyway, that girl ran off and the tall girl won the little guy. Good for her! I talked to him afterwards and I was like, “What the fuck happened,” and he said “Horhay.”  I asked him to spell it and he was like, (in French accent) “jjjee,-ee-oh-ar-jjjee-ee.” (Pause) That’s not “Horhay” that’s fucking George. You can’t pull wool over my eyes. That’s a (pointing) deal breaker name right there.
  4. Like if your name was Olga, I don’t care HOW good looking you can make yourself in a day, I couldn’t date you. Beatrice. Maud. Gertrude. Helga? I don’t even want to know your name just in case. I mean everything’s going fine, just keep your mouth shut. (Smile)
  • III. Brad P’s Banter Openers
    • ::: HORSE GIRL:::
  1. I have to ask. Do you like horses? I thought so. Okay, check this out. When I was in the third grade there was this girl, and she loved horses. She loved them more than anything. She used to draw horses all over her binder, she’d be making horse noises, she’d be running around the schoolyard galloping. We used to call her “The Weird Horse Girl.” (She: So why are you telling me this)
  2. Well, you look JUST like her! (She: It’s not me)
  3. You know what? I’m 90% sure it’s not you, but if it was me, I wouldn’t admit it either. So, just in case it’s you—and I’m not saying it’s definitely you—but just in case it’s you and you don’t want to admit it, I just want to say I’m sorry (She: Sorry for what?)
  4. Sorry for all the times I used to make fun of you. See, back in school I was one of the cool kids and I was a bit of a bully and I used to make fun of the The Weird Horse Girl. NOW, I feel so bad. I feel so guilty. I’ve been going to therapy and my therapist says I should find this girl and right all the wrongs of my past, so I just want to say I’m sorry and see if you’d EVER forgive me. (She: Yes)
  5. (Hugging her) Oh my God you are so cool! I can’t believe you turned out to be cute and cool. This is like the craziest thing!
    • ::: LAST NIGHT’S LAY:::
  1. You look familiar. Have we had sex? Oh my God! Yes, it’s you! It’s so good to see you!
  2. Hey, listen, sorry I haven’t called. Been kind of busy. My, um, phone, um, stopped, um, working and my tire got a flat, and my dog ate my homework. But tell your friend I said hi and that she was great too.
  3. It wasn’t you? I could have sworn it was you. You look just like this girl I had sex with last week—actually I can’t quite remember what she looks like, I was kind of drunk…No, I’m pretty sure it was you.

::: ONE LINERS :::

  • You’re the third cutest girl here!
  • Hey watch out for these girls here. They are professional pick picketers! They’ll steal your phone and purse.
  • YOU and I are STUNNING! But MOSTLY me!
  • I have to compliment you. You’re very reasonably attractive (Only say this to 9’s and 10’s)
  • To a Short Girl: You’re the Tiny Dangerous one here! Gotta watch out for you.
  • My mom told me to come to the club and find a nice girl. You’re the perfect girl to take home to my mom!
  • To a Girl SUPER dressed up: You’re the most stylish girl here! I bet you’re a shopaholic.
  • Stop looking at my ass whenever I walk by. It’s JUST. NOT. COOL.
  • Let’s go steal a car.

A2 ATTRACT, part 1 of 2. (Banter/Neg with Appreciation/Smile)

This is THE key to attraction. Hands down.

Do this within your FIRST TWO SENTENCES. It sets the tone right away. If you wait too long to banter/neg, it will be harder to do it down the line, because it might seem out of character. The beauty of the Brad P openers is you’re bantering right from the get go. Mystery’s Girl Fight and Style’s Jealous Girlfriend have banter lines built into them, too.

I’m giving you a shit-ton of lines to choose from. They go great with the direct openers I gave you above… with the possible exception of the Movie Moment opener.

Buuuuuut, again, just pick ONE banter line. Practice it five times in the mirror before going out. Then practice it at least on five different sets out in the field. This one routine here will completely transform your game. I know it did for me.

Also, KINO when you say your banter line. Kino and banter aren’t separate. They’re one. Kino here would be something like a light tap on the arm or hand before you deliver the banter.

I broke the banter lines into five different characters. That’s where the humor comes in. The words themselves are kind of funny, some aren’t at all. The real humor comes from how you say the words. From how you act out the character.

Also, each character has a sexual charge to it, because the underlying character in all the banter lines is you’re the dominant one and she’s cute. You’re the sexual selector, and she’s chasing you.

When you banter, honest-to-God ACT OUT the character, as if you’re pretending to be him… or in some cases her.

Again, I know I sound like a broken record, but I want to drive this point home… PICK ONLY ONE LINE AT A TIME.

Don’t make the mistake I made and try to learn all of them at once. It will end in tragedy, I promise.

Pick one line, practice saying it in the mirror as a cocky guy, or a hot valley girl, or a principal. Then go out in the field and practice it on at least five sets. That’s the way I learned. There’s something about practicing banter with another human that drills it into your bones.

Once you feel like the banter line is natural, THEN you can learn another line. This is like learning another language. How to speak Woman…

Remember, learn just ONE line at a time.

Okay, here goes.

1. Banter Lines from Lance Mason, David DeAngelo, Brad P, Mystery, and Style

  • I. The Judge (Judge Her) 
    • What are you doing in a bar for godsakes? Can’t you find a nice normal guy? Are you desperate?
    • Wait. You’re a republican, aren’t you.
    • You girls are BAD girls. I have to watch out for you.
    • You guys are trouble. I can already tell.
    • I don’t know about you yet.
    • She looks sweet and innocent but something tells me she’s not.
    • Part of me wants to stay here and talk to you guys and part of me wants to run as fast as I can.
    • Let me see you flirt. Wow, now that was terrible. It actually made me go gay for a second.
    • That’s it, I’m going to talk to those more interesting girls over there.
    • Oh my God you guys are like Charlie’s Angels. You can be Drew Barrymore, you can be Lucy Liu, and you can be Bosley (to the target) – Lovedrop
    • Did you know that 93% of all women masturbate in the shower? (their response) Do you know what the other 7% do? (they say no) Oh. So you’re one of the ones…who…(nod knowingly) – Brad P.
    • Did you know that when you sleep your heart actually stops for 45 minutes every night? Option A. She believes you: No you dork! You know, you just failed the smart test. I don’t know if I can hang out with you anymore (smile of course to soften) OR Option B. She doesn’t believe you: You know what, you just passed the smart test. I think you might be smart enough to hang out with me. – Brad P.
  •  II. Cocky Casanova 
    • 1. I AM GORGEOUS
      • Don’t look at me like that. You’ll get hypnotized and start thinking naughty thoughts.
      • Stop it! You’re looking at me like a fat kid looks at a cheeseburger.
      • Stop looking at me like an ice cream cone. It’s creeping me out.
      • I’m not just a slab of hot young beefcake. I’m a feelings man. I have feelings you know.
      • Come here. I’ll let you stand next to me for a minute.
      • It’s ok. I’m just a sexy man.
      • I used to be too modest. But, I worked at it, and now I’m perfect.
      • I’m not sure if you’re aware of this, but I’m sort of a big deal around here. (Imitate Will Ferrell from Anchor Man)
      • No autographs please.
      • Note to self: Do NOT date this girl.
      • I can already tell, you and I are NOT going to get along. We’re too similar. If I hung out with you I’d be bald with all the hair I’d be pulling out of my head.
      • I can already tell. You and I would NEVER get along. So don’t even try hitting on me.
      • Too bad you’re not my type.
      • You’re not my type. Your boyfriend must be a really cool guy.
      • You are so beautiful, it’s a shame you’re not my type. It’s weird. Logically I know you’re a pretty girl. But I don’t feel for you the way I do with girls I’m into. But we have such a good conversation.
      • You’d make a good friend.
      • I don’t think I’m your type (she: yes you are) But I’m really weird (she: I like that) Yeah but sometimes I’m just like a little boy.
      • Man I would be such a horrible boyfriend. I’d probably cheat on you, never shower, your heart would be broken. You should go for that guy over there. Let’s go talk to him right now.
      • We definitely should not get to know each other. You’re too much of a nice girl for me.
      • It’s too bad that you (pick a random quality of hers, like she has blonde hair) because I would totally get together with you.
      • Go talk to that guy over there (the most dorky guy there). He’s perfect for you. Want me to introduce you? Because I will…(walking towards him)
      • (look her up and down) You can’t have me.
      • I’ve eaten girls like you for breakfast. You don’t scare me.
    • 4. I LIKE YOU… KINDA
      • That’s it. I’m making you my new girlfriend. Wait. Can you cook?
      • I’m making you my new girlfriend. But on Tuesdays only. You’ll be my Tuesday Girlfriend. And if you’re good you can work your way up to my Friday Girlfriend. That’s where the real fun begins.
      • Oh my God you are so CUTE! I’m going to take you home in my little pocket and ask my roommates if I can keep you. Wait. Are you housebroken?
      • That’s it, we’re getting married. We’re gonna fly to Vegas tomorrow and get married… by a midget Elvis. You’ll be Catwoman, and I’ll be Batman. It’ll be awesome.
      • You know what I’d do with you? I’d totally dress you from head to foot in a red… PVC… Devil outfit. With horns, pitch fork, tail, and of course the bitch boots that go up to your thighs with the five inch heels. Now your friend here (the target because everyone wants to be the devil), I’d dress her head to toe in a white, PVC angel outfit. With a halo, fuzzy wings, a harp, and the bitch boots that up to your thigh with the five inch heels. And then we’d roll through the club with one on each arm and we’d make all the girls jealous. And whenever I’d have to make a decision, I’d let the two of you fight over which one is more fun. And whichever is more fun, we’d do that. (Tyler Durgen)
      • You know what I wanna do with you? I want us to go to the beach together. You’d wear a nun’s outfit and I’d wear a priest’s outfit and we’d hold hands and make out in front of everybody. And everybody would be like, “what the fuck?” It’d be awesome. -(Style)
      • You know what? I’m gonna take you back to my place tonight. I’ve got a…Honey I Shrunk the Kids machine. I’d shrink us down to the size of Ken and Barbie dolls and we’d swim and explore my fish tank. And we’d find magical new lands and have amazing adventures. (Love Drop)
      • You know what I’d do with you? I’d dress you up in black leather head to toe because you’re the bad one and I’d dress you in white leather head to toe because you’re the good one. Then I’d take you in my space ship, we’d travel the galaxy, and you’d be my space princesses. And then when we’d come back to earth we’d make all the girls jealous. (Mehow)
      •  That’s it. I’m in love with you. Now what?
      • You’re way too sexy. Get out of here. No really… go!
      • I’m sorry this had to come our here tonight, but it’s over between us.
      • That’s it. I’m demoting you to my Tuesday girlfriend. But if you work hard enough you can become my Friday girlfriend. That’s where the real fun happens.
      • I’m breaking up with you. You keep the cat. I’ll keep the CDs.
      • Did you just go for a feelsky?
      • Hey, hey, hey. Hands off the merchandise. This shit ain’t for free. That’ll be forty dollars, missie.
      • Stop, don’t touch me. I don’t even know you.
      • Lady I’m not going to make out with you! I have a girlfriend! Jeez.
      • Will you PLEASE stop touching me? (She: Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t know I was touching you.) Well you did. And if you’re going to keep doing it, I’d appreciate it if you’d touch a little Lower. (She: Touchy touchy) Yes, I don’t like being touched. So keep a foot or so between us please. *Smile*
      • So, this is the part where you grab my ass.
      • You think you can take me? Let’s take this outside.
  • III. Valley Girl
    • Quit looking at my chest. My eyes are up here!
    • I swear all you girls think about is one thing.
    • At least buy me a drink first.
    • Stop treating me like a mindless piece of meat.
    • I’m not just a piece of meat. I have feelings. I’m a feelings man.
    • I wore my old briefs tonight to make sure nothing happened.
    • I need lots of trust and comfort first.
    • Easy there, hardcore. I’m dainty. Be gentle.
    • Why are girls always so logical? Why can’t they just feel and be in the moment?
    • I’m CUTE! Not smart.
    • You’re getting me all emotional. I promised my friends I wouldn’t go home with anyone tonight.
    • You’re my new BFF! Best Friends Forever!
    • Uh, whatever.
    • You would.
    • You would say that.
    • I’m putting you in my friend’s zone.
    • I’m leaving you for someone richer and older. My inner-woman is too high maintenance for you. -Style
    • Um, I have to go to the bathroom.
    • What’s that stuff they put in people’s drinks? (Roofies) Whoa! Roofies? I was going to say vodka. I put vodka in my drinks. I don’t know what the fuck is up with you guys. I cannot trust you girls. Do not leave me alone with these girls. This is a little creepy. -Lovedrop
  • IV. The Authority Figure
      • You’ve just earned yourself detention. Go to the Principal’s Office!
      • You’re fired!
      • You’re hired. I’m making you my new assistant.
      • You’re off the island!
      • I’m giving you a ticket.
    • 4. I’M YOUR FATHER — SPANK! 
      • I don’t know who your boyfriend is, but he is NOT spanking you enough. Don’t look at me. I’m not doing the spanking. I’m just saying you need a good one.
      • Bad Girl! Go to my room.
      • I think someone needs a time-out.
      • No more love for you. Tough love is all you get from here on out.
  • V. The Innocent Victim — She’s Sexy or Putting The Moves On YOu
    • You’re bad. You’re making me think impure thoughts.
    • I think I need permission to talk with you.
    • Quit corrupting me. We’re wholesome people here.
    • My mom definitely wouldn’t approve of this.
  • VI. Negs
      • You’re such a brat.
      • You’re such a dork.
      • You’re such a Power Puff Girl.
      • You usually hang out at the library, don’t you.
      • You’re like my little sister. Lovable, but a little annoying.
      • So, how long have you been a crack head?
      • So, what was it like living in the half-way house?
      • Ok, little drunk girl.
      • Dear Diary, Renaissan is such a jerk… (fill in with her complaint) (After you do something she dislikes and she complains about it.)
      • (If she curses) Uh-oh, turret syndrome. (Imitate: Shit, fuck, mother-fucker)
      • You are such a nerd…at least you’re nice
      • You would look so cute… with a mowhawk!
      • You are so bad at being pretty.
      • Check this girl out. She’s amazing, and so bright and funny. Would you believe she’s never had a date?
      • You know what I love about you? Absolutely nothing.
      • Nice nails, are they real? Oh. Well. I guess they still look good.
      • You have the cutest crooked smile.
      • Your nose wiggles when you laugh. Ha! There it goes again!
      • Nice hair, did you dye it? And you dyed it to that?
      • Nice shoes. I bet they were beautiful when they were new.
      • Do you always wear that lipstick?
      • I thought I loved you, then you pulled your straw out like that. That was the most gross thing. You probably pick your toe nails.
      • Ew, you spit on me.
      • There’s something in your teeth.
      • Delicate shoulders, slim waist, birthing hips (and smile)
      • Man, you can dress her up but you can’t take her anywhere.
      • How do you roll with this girl? Is she always like this?
      • You’ve gotta get her out of the library more.
      • Did you forget to take your medication today?
      • Where’s your fun switch?
      • Is she always like this?
      • How do you guys roll with her?
      • Does she have an off button?
      • Wow, she poops words. I should have brought my raincoat.
      • What’re you doing? Jeez. You must’ve drove your parents crazy.
      • Alright, you’re losing me. (turn away) – (say if she says something weird after a DHV spike)
      • Did you just wake up?
      • Oh I get it. You probably act like this all the time and probably get away with it too, but I don’t buy it. You probably act like a bitch and convince people you are a bitch because so many dorks hit on you. But I bet you’re actually a really nice person. I bet you’re really loyal, and you really care about your friends and family, going out of your way for them. You’re like a piece of hard candy that’s rock hard on the outside, but at the center is soft and sweet. (Brad P)
    • 4. NON-VERBAL
      • Squint.
      • Put a finger up in her face while she’s talking so you can hear the other person talking.
      • Body Rock Away
      • Roll off.
      • Here hold this for me. (Then turn back and talk to someone else)
      • Mimic her
      • Stick your tongue out at her

2. Funny Stories… VERY, VERY OPTIONAL! In place of a banter line you can tell a funny story to make her laugh. But stories are way longer and kinda cumbersome. You really don’t need them. Banter lines do the trick faster and they’re more interactive. Interactive = way better.

These stories work only if you ACT THEM OUT. I know I keep hammering this point home. But the humor comes in the personality beneath the words. Make these stories visually fun, expressive, emotional. Act out characters whenever they speak. Also, make sure to check in with your audience, so it’s interactive.

  • I. The Restaurant
    • Get this. I was at this restaurant having lunch, the waiter walks past and I say, “Hey man, can I get the check?” And he’s like, “It’s been already taken care of.” Has that ever happened to you guys? Well, it’s never happened to me. So I say to him, “Who took care of it?” And he says, “I can’t tell you.” So, I’m like…right, one of my friends must be fucking with me. So I look around and I see some couples…some business lunches…and THEN I see this guy smiling at me from across the way. And I’m like, great. So, I go over to him and I’m like, “Listen, I appreciate it, I’m really flattered, but it’s not going to happen. I’m not GAY (goofy, dorky voice).” And he looks me straight in the eye (do weirded out look) and say, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I was so embarrassed. – Lovedrop
  • II. Wrong Number
    • Do you ever answer phone calls you don’t recognize? Don’t you think sometimes it’s a mistake though? Cuz I totally made this mistake last weekend. I get this phone call and it’s this chick. She’s like “Hey is Renaissan there?” I say “Yeah, this Renaissan.” She’s like “Oh my God, this is Melissa you’ll never believe what happened to me today.” She totally shoots off into this whole story about her day. The whole time I’m thinking, “who the fuck is Melissa?” And so finally I had to stop her and was like “wait a minute how do I know you?” And she’s like (frustrated) “Among other things, I meet you at the bars over the weekend.” I was like, it’s still not ringing a bell. She goes: “Well, do you even remember FUCKING me?” So, now I’m like holy shit what happened here? “Wait, who did you say you were calling?” This is Renaissan. RIGHT?” “Yeah. Renaissan who?” “Renaissan D. RIGHT?” “Noooo-ho-ho. You’ve got the wrong phone number.” Cuz, you see Renaissan D is my really good friend who apparently likes to give my number out to girls he never wants to talk to again. But I’ll tell you though… I know he wasn’t ready for the phone call he got because I gave her the right number. Bam.” – Joey from Pickup 101
  • III. Revolving Door
    • What should a guy of for a woman at a revolving door? Well, get this. I’m at Neiman Marcus, right? And I’m kinda walking up to a revolving door and in the reflection I see this really hot girl walking up, and I’m like “Oh my God I wanna open the door.” So, I’m pushing the door and I kind of get stuck in the compartment behind the girl. And I’m pushing the door so I’m like (demo dry humping her) Anyway, the door opens and she kinda stumbles out (act out stumble out) and she like (pause, weird look) “Um, am I like supposed to tip you are something?” Anyway, I got 20 bucks out of it. Not a bad gig. – Lance Mason, Pickup 101
  • IV. Bisexual Thug
    • Did you just grab my ass? Everyone keeps grabbing my ass. Get this. I’m out with my friends having a kick-ass time and I meet this girl that I totally hit it off with. One of my friends walks up to me and whispers in my ear (exaggerated “watch out” voice), “Hey man, I think she has a boyfriend and he’s standing over there.” I turn to look and I see this HUMUNGOUS 250 pound guy. Bald head…and he does not look happy AT ALL. His arms were folded and he’s eyeing me, looking me up and down, like this (demo) while this girl is all giggly and touching my arm (demo)…and I’m FREAKING out. So I go back to my friends and later that night I walk past the two of them and I overhear the girl say to the big guy, “Hey, there goes that guy.” And I hear this HUMUNGOUS guy say in this REALLY effeminate voice, “Too bad. He was thooooo cute. Go hurry up and find me anotfer one.” – Style
  • V. Accidental Threesome
    • Have you ever had a threesome? Well, I had my first one last week. Get this. This girl took me home and I wake up at like 4 am to take a leak. I crawl back into bed to cuddle with her and the next thing I know this guy and girl are screaming at me, “What the fuck are you doing feeling up my girl?” “Ahhhh! Rapist!” I was disoriented, so it took me a few minutes to figure out what had happened. I had crawled into bed with my girl’s roommate and her boyfriend. It was my first threesome. And let me tell you it was fantastic. – adapted from Cosmo magazine

3. Kino. Do within 30 SECONDS of opening, with Banter. Again just PICK ONE.

  • Touch her arm, step back, banter. (Example: “Hey you guys seem fun.” Touch arm. “Wait.” Step back. “You’re Republican, aren’t you.”
  • High Five or Knock Fists a girl if she says something cool.
  • Fun Handshakes and High Fives
    • DOWN LOW: Slap me five. To the side. Down low. (Pull hand away) Too slow. 
    • DRUNK GIRLFRIEND HANDSHAKE: Do you know the San Diego handshake? Ok hold out your hand (slap each side of the hand then knock fists) But a little more loose. Loosen up. Go like this (horse-like blowing out of air and shake) Good job Ok go like this. (Do handshake again) But not so hard. It hurts. (Do it a third time) That’s cool. Do you know the L.A. handshake? Okay, go like this. (shake hands, curl fingers together, thumb lock, knock fists) Nice. Okay, do you know the NY handshake? Make a fist. Now go like this. (bump fist from top, then from bottom, knock fists) Very good. Okay, now go like this. (put out forearm, squiggle each other down each other’s forearms) Again. (Do it a second time) Now one more time? (Do it a third time.) (She: what’s that? I don’t know. Some drunk girl showed me that. (She laugh but Back turn/roll off like you don’t care) (-Love Drop)
    • SAN FRANCISCO HANDSHAKE: Here’s the New York Handshake. Now do you know the San Francisco Handshake? This is how they actually shake hands in San Francisco. (Two air kisses on either side of her cheek) (in a really gay voice) Oh my gawd! You look FANTABULOUS! (Spin her around maybe?) Have you lost weight? We so have to go shopping together. You’d buy me the best cashmere sweater ever! That’s actually how they shake hands in San Francisco, I swear to God.
  • Spin Moves 
    • STEAL HER SEAT: Wait, so go like this for a sec? (put out your hand so she puts her in yours) Now stand up? (Stand her up) (Steal her seat/sit in her spot) Oh! Just kidding. I can only stay a sec. Hey, stay close. Now, get this…(story, trivia, DHV game)
    • SPIN MOVE: Here go like this (take her hand, lift it up, and spin her around) Very nice…I bet you were a ballet geek OR Very nice, very graceful. That’s what you get for being good. (she: what do I get for being bad?)
  • Hugs
    • HUG TEST
      1. Okay we’ve been talking for like 5 minutes and I have to see if you give good hugs or not. Otherwise I’m going to have to stick you into the friend zone. (She hugs you)
      2. B -.
      3. (Hug her so both your hearts touch)
      4. So many of us hug without our hearts touching.  A true hug is when your hearts touch. Now that’s a hug. A +.
      5. Okay, that’s enough. Get off me.
  • Daring Kino 
  • Kino Test: The kino test is HUGE. It’s like asking a question. If she answers yes, then take a step further. Then break it off first. Don’t wait for her to do it. Always leave HER wanting more. This is the dance of seduction.
    • KINO TEST #1
      • You’ve made the girls laugh. When you’re about to leave (a.k.a. “false takeaway”) reach out your hand and see if she takes it.
      • If she takes your hand, squeeze it. If she squeezes back, STAY!
    • KINO TEST #2
      • Here’s another trick. After the handshake, slide your fingers off her hand. That way it’s no longer a “business as usual” handshake, but a sensual one… in a subtle way.
      • Get your ass back in the set, qualify her dammit! “Are you a creative person?” You can then test her “creativity” by isolating her within the set and doing something like the Cube on her.
      • If she’s slow to go for the high-five, she’s probably not attracted yet. Continue with your takeaway and leave. You can come back later. When you do, demonstrate value to her friends. If you’ve won over her friends, you’ll probably win her over, too.
    • KINO TEST #3
      • Here’s another kino test. Let’s say you high-five her instead of shaking her hand. If she complies, don’t release her hand yet. Instead, take her hand that’s still in yours and put it behind your back, out of the view of the others.
      • Squeeze her hand. If she squeezes back, move your fingers to her fingers and play with them. This is EXTREMELY sensual. And the best part is it’s discreet. If she doesn’t move her hand away, she’s definitely attracted. Throw her hand away and roll off.
      • As always, you’re balancing interest with disinterest here. It also shows you have self-control.

4. Contingencies. It’s good to have a few contingencies prepared. You’ll hear the same old questions over and over. And the same shit tests. And the same interrupts. And the same whatever else. It’s good to be prepared, so you’re not thrown off guard by any of these patterns that WILL come up.

  • I. What do you do?
    • I’m a glorified bum.
    • My passion is… (fill in whatever your passion is… speaking EMOTIONALLY rather than factually)
  • II. Where are you from?
    • From the glimmer in my father’s eyes.
    • Well, my mother is Caribbean and my father is Italian. It’s funny because Caribbeans are know for their incredible carnivals, and Italians are known for food, wine, festivities, the fine things in life. And I turned out to be a bookworm. Go figure.
  • III. What’s your name?
    • Justin…Timberlake.
  • IV. How old are you?
    • I’m 65. Let me order. I get the senior discount.
  • V. Do you have a girlfriend? (Credit: Brad P)
    1. No (ashamed, sad). I have 8 girlfriends (happy like a 4 year old)! Yeah it’s no big whoop, it’s not big deal. They all get together and swap recipes so they can learn how to cook my favorite food. But I’ll tell you something—and I don’t usually do this—but I’ve been searching for a ninth girlfriend. And I don’t know you very well yet but I have a really good feeling about you and I want to know if you want to be my ninth girlfriend. Right now. (she wants to be #1)
    2. I know, I know. I’ll tell you what. I NEVER do this, so please don’t tell anyone, but I can make you #6, right now. I’m making you #6. (she still wants to be #1)
    3. You know what? I can make you #3, but that’s my final offer. Final offer. (She accepts)
    4. Hey guys, I don’t know if she told you, but we’re boyfriend and girlfriend, so I’m going to spend a little alone time with my girlfriend. We’ll be back in a little bit.
  • VI. You’re short.
    • Yes I am. Great things come in small packages.
  • VII. Will you buy me a drink?
    • I’d be happy to. But let me get to know you better first.
    • Why don’t you buy me a drink?
    • I don’t even know you yet.
    • What, do you go around asking all the guys this?
    • This is moving too fast.
    • Oh my God! Are you trying to get me drunk?
  • VIII. Will you hold my purse?
    • You gotta be kidding me you just asked me to hold your purse. Do I have to give you the look?
  • IX. Any other demand
    • Before I do that, give me at least one compliment.
  • X. I have a boyfriend.
    • Maybe he can make us breakfast in bed.
    • Cool. Anyway…
    • That’s cool. I have an uncle that has 5 cats. 4 blue ones and 1 red one. He dyed them blue and red. You should check it out sometime. Anyway…
  • XI. Do you say this to all the girls?
    • Yes, you’re the 512th person I’ve said this to today.
  • XII. Does this make me look fat?
    • Yeah I wasn’t going to say anything.
  • XIII. She says something egotistical:
    • I’ve eaten girls like you for breakfast.
  • XIV. Any Shit Test.
    • Cute.
    • Anyway.
    • Whatever.
    • The capital of France is Jupiter.
    • 7+3=947.
    • Do you always wear that lipstick? Anyway…
  • XV. External Interrupts
    • Introduce me, it’s the polite thing to do.
  • XVI. Internal Interrupts
    • Hello I’m talking here. Jeez. Is she always like this?
    • May I finish my sentence first?
  • XVII. She Gets Distracted
    • Hey ADD Party’s over here.
    • Hey, Party’s over here.
  • XVIII. Extreme Rudeness
    • Oh, that was weird.
    • Wow, that was rude.
    • Wow, you’re really snotty, aren’t you.
    • Anyway…
  • XIX. Playful Questions
    • I just figured out where you’re from. The Congo! (or whatever obviously is opposite to her nationality)
    • I bet I can guess your major. Underwater Basket Weaving.
    • I bet I can guess what you do. (Cold read her)
  • XX. Playful Compliments
    • You are so adorable…it’s sickening!
    • Oh my God, you’re a ballet dancer? That’s so cool! …I can’t even talk to you right now.
    • You are the shit…too bad you’re not my type.

A2 ATTRACT, part 2 of 2. (Introduce Who You Are a.k.a DHV)

Again, pick only ONE! Are you sick of me saying this yet? Practice it five times to commit it to memory, five times in front of the mirror to get the delivery right, and five times out in the field. Master just one. Then you can move on and learn another.

I know I’m giving you a lot of stuff here, and it can be overwhelming. But remember it doesn’t mean you gotta learn em all before you go out. You only need ONE solid DHV, followed by one solid qualifier.

Okay, so where are we so far?

So far, you’ve opened, you’ve bantered, and you’ve softened your banter with a little appreciation. For example, to soften your banter you could say something like “you guys seem cool. You don’t mind a complete stranger coming up to you and bantering.” Or whatever you come up with.

After you’ve done that, now it’s time to ANCHOR that attraction with some substance. She’s probably asking herself now, “who is this person?” Answer it. In other words, introduce who you are to her. Some examples.

1. Tell Her What Your Passion Is. Below is my own personal passion. Obviously fill it in with your own.

  • My passion in life is writing. And I can’t think of better way to have stuff to write about than to go up to complete strangers and talk with them. Are you a passionate person? What lights you up?

2. Make An Observation About Her. These are great because you’re showing value but IN TERMS OF HER. Help her and her friends have a good time. Show your personality by taking the spotlight off yourself.

    1. I have to ask before I run. Do you always wear a ring on that finger? (OR if she’s not wearing rings) Do you usually not wear any rings?
    2. The reason I’m asking is the finger a person chooses to put a ring on says something about their personality. Someone did this on me and I don’t how much truth there is to it, but she nailed me down pretty good. The fact you wear a ring on that finger (OR that you wear no rings) says something fascinating about you.
    3. Here, let me see your hand. Back in ancient Greece, each mound represented a different god. And a person back then would put a ring on the associated finger to honor that god. (Save the finger she has a ring on for last)
    4. For example, the thumb represented Hades, the god of the underworld. He was one of the few gods that lived separate from Mount Olympus, just like the thumb is separate from the other fingers. So, someone who wears a ring on this finger is independent and doesn’t like to follow other people’s trends. Instead, they like to make their own.
    5. The index finger was Zeus, and he was the king of the gods. And just like when a mother is scolding their daughter (act this out), someone who wears a ring on this finger has an inclination to take charge.
    6. The middle finger was Dionysus, the god of wine and partying and having a great time. And just like this finger represents something that’s not G-rated, someone who wears a ring on this finger has a little bit of a wild side.
    7. The ring finger is one of the coolest. This was Aphrodite, the goddess of love. And you can look this up, it’s true. This finger is the only one that has a vein that goes straight to your heart without branching off. (demo line going from finger to her heart). So anyone who wears a ring on this finger is actually making a direct connection with their heart. That’s why to this day we’ll wear our wedding ring on this finger.
    8. Finally, the pinky finger was Ares, the god of war. And you’ll notice a lot of mobsters will wear their ring on this finger. Someone who wears a ring on this finger has some inner turmoil or conflict within. They like to fight. And if you had given someone a pinky ring back then it mean “fuck you” or “go to hell.”
    9. And for someone who doesn’t wear rings, like me that meant you were aligned with Hermes. He was one of the most mischievous of the gods. And he was the one that flew from Mount Olympus to earth. So, someone who doesn’t wear rings is open-minded, loves to travel, likes to be helpful, but has a little bit of a mischievous side. And that’s definitely me.
    10. So, you are…
    11. Is there any truth to that?
    12. So, what about you. (Qualify) – Style
    1. Okay, I have to ask. How long have you known each other? (She: answers)
    2. See I knew that. (She: how?)
    3. Well, for one, you have the same exact smile. And for two, well, let me just give you the test. I’ll give you the Best Friend Test. (She: agrees)
    4. Do you use the same shampoo? (They look at each other first)
    5. You don’t even have to answer, you already passed. You looked at each other before even answering the question. You just did it again. And again.
    6. See, if you weren’t close, you’d keep eye contact with me. But when two people have a connection, they make eye contact first, even over something as mundane as shampoo.
    7. You guys are awesome. Too bad I’m taken though. (or whatever disqualifer/neg) How do you guys know each other? – Style
    1. I just learned this cool thing. What’s amazing is you can learn whether someone’s lying or telling the truth by reading their eye movements. For example, if you could take a vacation anywhere in the world, where would you go?
    2. The reason I asked you is because I wanted to see how your eyes moved. We all favor different directions when we think about something. People who are visual will look up for a picture. (demo)
    3. People who are logical, like lawyers and accountants tend to look to the side when they think. (demo)
    4. People who live in their emotions, or who learn by touch, look down when they think. (demo)
    5. You are a — person because you looked —
    6. The thing is, we use them all at different times, depending on what we’re experiencing. But you can tell a lot about how a person thinks by what direction they favor the most.
    7. Return to topic of their ideal vacation, connect then qualify… – Style
  • ::: C & U SMILES :::
    1. Smile for me again? Ah, you have a U Smile.
    2. The U Smile is when you smile and your teeth go straight back into your mouth like a horse. It’s perceived as unfriendly.
    3. The C Smile is when you smile and all you see is a row of pearly whites in the front. It’s perceived as friendly.
    4. Brittney Spears has a C Smile and Christina Aguillera has a U Smile. And if you ever look on the cover of like Cosmo or Glamour, you’ll see the girl always has a C Smile.
    5. I heard about this girl in L.A. who took the theory so seriously that she actually had her teeth surgically removed so she could have a C Smile. She wanted to become a Pop-Star and thought that would help her chances—L.A. girls are crazy anyway.
    6. But you have a U Smile. But don’t worry, I still think you’re hot–in that short school bus sort of way. – Style
    1. (Bend her wrist, so multiple lines show) One line means you’re a virgin, two lines means you have average sex experience, and three lines means you’re a super sex expert, sex guru, sex ninja. And you have like 12 lines.
    2. By looking at this, I can tell that you’re great in relationships, you make a great girlfriend. And right now you’re kind of dating around, seeing a few different guys, and the weirdest thing is happening to you. You tend to go on one or two dates with a guy, and then you think that you like him. After two dates, you lose all attraction for him and you don’t know why.
    3. Now by looking at this, I can tell that you have a very good sense of humor. It’s kind of an off beat sense of humor. Okay, do you see this line that intersects with it? That means sometimes you don’t get the joke. Like has your friends ever asked if you have blonde roots?
    4. Okay, now this is your life line and you have another line that’s parallel to this. Now by looking at the parallel line I can tell what you were in a former life. You were a mermaid/unicorn/butterfly/lady bug/horse/or any other female friendly animal. Now your life line is really long. You’re going to live to be very, very old. But there’s a split in it. Now what this is, is this is a near death experience. You’re going to go into the tunnel, you’re totally going to see the light, and then you’re going to come back and the world is going to look a lot different to you. It’s going to be a real intense experience.
    5. Now, a little further down you have another cross and what that is, is that is a life changing experience. Okay, hold on, hold on, (close eyes) I’m getting a vision, I’m getting a vision, I’m getting a vision. Okay, I can see it. (open eyes) You’re going to meet a handsome, caramel-flavored man when you’re in you twenties (or however old she is). It’s going to be a life-changing experience. I can’t quite make out his face but he’s wearing (describe what you’re wearing) and standing in a bar. Oh, it’s gone. I lost it. I’m sorry. But that’s your future right there.

3. VERY VERY SUPER OPTIONAL. Honestly, I shouldn’t even put these in. You don’t need any of these silly routines. They don’t create attraction. They’re just entertaining filler, like bubble gum or soda or a magazine quiz.

They’re useful only if you’d like something to multiple thread with. That is, if you see one of the girls in your set losing attention, you can bring her back by throwing one of these goofy things out there. But seriously, you don’t need em.

  • I. Trivia with Numbers (used to multiple-thread)
    • 1. ::: 9’s :::
      • Okay here’s a piece of useless trivia. How many 9’s are there between 1 and 100. It’s actually 20. Because you have to count 90, 91, 92, 93, and 99 you count twice. – Mystery
    • 2. ::: DAYS IN A HUMAN LIFE :::
      • Okay, here’s a sobering fact for you. How many days do you think there are in an average human life? Don’t try to do the math or anything, just tell me the number that you think it is. 28,000. Isn’t that sobering? It just goes to show how limited our time on this earth is. Makes you ask what you’re doing with your life, doesn’t it. My passion is… What’s yours? – Adapted from Mystery
    • 3. ::: CONSECUTIVE DAYS :::
      • Here’s a brain teaser for you that I couldn’t even get. Can you say three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday? Answer: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow.
    • 4. ::: ESP :::
      • So, do you believe in ESP? No, yes…? Well, let’s try a little experiment.  I’ll see if I can read your mind. Pick a number between 1 and 4. Don’t say it outloud, just think it and I’ll try to read you mind. Ready? Was it three? Was it really? Okay, let’s up it up. Think of a number between 1 and 10 and I’ll try to read. Don’t say it out loud, just think it. Was it seven? It wasn’t? You’re shitting me. C’mon. Well, that’s why ESP is bullshit. Last try. Think of a number between 1 and 1. Don’t say it out loud, just think it… – Mystery
    • 5. ::: THE LYING GAME :::
      • Okay, let’s test to see how good of a liar you are. This is the Lying Game. It makes it a little fun if get a wager involved. How about a dollar? Okay, these are the rules. I’m going to ask you 5 questions and you have to answer each one of them wrong. If you get one right, then I win. But if you get all questions wrong, then you win. Okay? 1. What’s the color of my shirt? 2. What city are we in? 3. What month is it? 4. How many was that? 5. Man, you’re good at this. Have you played this before? OH! I got you! Gets ‘em every time. If you ever want to get a free drink, this is how you do it. Oh, and by the way, for playing you get to be part of the PEN15 Club. Here (write PEN15 inside her forearm) Go ahead and read it. (It’s supposed to say “penis”) I swear, everything that was funny in seventh grade is funny again as adults. Why is that? – Style
  • II. Jokes, Unanswered Questions, and Trivia: (used as filler)
  • 1. Bad Jokes
    • 8 9: Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
    • AIR & SEX: Why is air a lot like sex? It’s no big deal unless you’re not getting any.
    • POPCORN: What did the baby corn say to the mom corn? Popcorn.
    • PENIS IMPLANT: Yeah, I don’t mean to brag or anything but I got a bit of plastic surgery done, and it went really well. Yeah, well it cost a lot of money, but it was totally worth it. Well, it’s a secret. Ok. I got a penis implant. (Proudly with the feeling that you’re enormous now) I’m 4 inches now. -Brad P
  • 2. Unanswered Questions
    • CONGRESS: If con is the opposite of pro, then what’s the opposite of progress? (congress) Exactly.
    • ONE HAND CLAP: What’s the sound of one hand clapping?
  • 3. Useless Trivia
    • ELVIS: Get this. Did you know that Elvis dyed his hair black? Guess what his natural hair color was. Blonde. (Well, dirty blonde) No one really know why he dyed his hair black. Some say it was because he was a big admirer of Roy Orbison, others say it was because his mother dyed her hair black, and still others think it was because he thought it would bring out his blue eyes more. In any case, can you imagine the man who revolutionized rock n roll, the king, as a blonde Beach Boy. Just doesn’t seem the same. See this? All natural. What about you? Oh, cool. And you changed it to that? – Adapted from Mystery
    • CUTTING ONIONS: Did you know that if you chew gum while chopping onions, it stops you from crying?
    • ANIMALS: Elephants are the only mammal that can’t jump. Kangaroos can’t walk backwards. Penguins are the only bird that can swim, but not fly.
    • THE THREE MOST TOLD LIES: What are the 3 most told lies? The first is, the check is in the mail (or we’ll call you) The second one is, look this is only going to hurt a little bit. And the third one is, “oh come on. I’m not going to come in your mouth.”  -Lovedrop

A3 QUALIFY, part 1 of 3

In my humble opinion, qualification is more important than DHV. It’s the turning point of the attract phase. Get to the turning point as soon as you can so you can move the story along. And get to the turning point within 3 – 5 minutes. Sometimes you can even open with a qualifier… if she shows signs she’s interested before you approach. Without qualification you won’t get to the next phase, you won’t be able to connect with her.

Qualification is more important, in my opinion, also because it makes her invest. DHV you’re doing the work, in qualification, she works. Besides, you get to learn about her. Along with DHV, qualification creates mutual self-disclosure. Again, it begins a connection with her, yet challenges her at the same time.

Qualification is basically banter/neg in question form. It’s not just a comfortable “get-to-know-you” question. There’s an edge. It’s like an interviewer wanting to see if a candidate makes the cut or not. Same thing here. Does she make the cut for you? You’re evaluating her. It implies you’ve got high status, and it makes her work to convince you she’s “good” enough for you.

The community makes a big deal out of negs/DHV. Banter is the key to attraction. But so is qualification. What’s your goal when you approach? Banter first. Then get to qualification. By the way, you can qualify within the set or you can do it in isolation.

As always, I’m gonna give you a ton of qualifiers, but guess what? You only need to pick one. Amazing, right? Credit goes to Mystery for most of these. Pick the one that sounds like it fits your personality. Here goes.

1. What’s Beyond Your Looks?

  • What makes you unique?
  • So, what have you got going for you besides your looks?
  • Is there more to you than meets the eye?
  • What are your three best qualities?
  • There are lots of beautiful women here. But more important than beauty is a positive outlook, a curiosity and willingness to grow (or fill in three qualities that are important to you). Outside of your good looks, what would make someone want to get to know you better?
  • Who are you?
  • What type of character are you?
  • Are you adventurous?
  • Are you fun?
  • Are you spontaneous?

2. Are You Passionate?

  • Are you a passionate person?
  • What are you passionate about?
  • What lights you up?
  • If a genie came along and you could be POOF anything you want to be… what would you choose? And don’t say princess.
  • What’s something you could do for hours?
  • What’s something you enjoyed doing when you were seven?
  • If you could be famous for anything, what would it be?
  • What’s the one thing you can’t say no to?
  • You know, a lot of people say they’re going to do a lot of certain things, but when it comes down to it, it’s just talk. Are you like this?

3. What Abilities Do You Have?

  • What talents do you have that would surprise me?
  • Can you cook?
  • Can you dance?

4. What Interests Do You Have?

  • If you could choose any art to do, what would it be and what would it be about?
  • If you could wake up anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would it be?
  • What would you do if money were no object?
  • Is there something you’ve dreamed of doing for awhile? Why haven’t you done it?
  • If you came across a genie one day and he could give you any wish, what would it be? And don’t say I wish for more wishes.
  • If a genie gave you a million dollars, what would you do with it?
  • What do you want to be when you grow up? And don’t say princess.


  • Oh my God I LOVE this girl!
  • You know what? You’re actually pretty cool. I’m curious about you.
  • Are you single?


1. Isolation Close

  • (To her friends) Hey guys, I’ve been kind of mean to your friend. Is it okay if I talk to her for a sec? We’ll be right over there. (kino: lead her by the hand or put her arm on yours and lead her to an isolation spot in the venue.)
  • (To her) Hey, check this out… (turn your back so you’re just facing your target instead of the whole group and do something like the cube. Mini-isolation. Credit: Lance Mason)

2. Number Close

  • We should totally hang out sometime. Let’s exchange info and we can grab a cup of tea. (After you exchange numbers, don’t leave. Talk for a bit. You could even call her right there and then on the phone and flirt.) Hello, this is the sex god. Man, I just met this great girl. She’s really cute and smart and I’m really excited about meeting her. (Whatever. Make her laugh, then hang up and make a date) So, when are you free? (Set up the date right NOW to avoid phone game later. Ask what HER schedule is like. Don’t constantly offer up days that she can say she’s not free on. Now you can jet. Talk a few minutes after you exchange numbers, and it’ll avoid buyer’s remorse for her.)
  • I’m having such a great time but I gotta get going. We should totally get together again because I love talking with you. What’s the best way to get a hold of each other again? (Note: the word “because” increases the chance of her complying. Doesn’t even have to be a good reason. Just adding the word “because” in there makes it more likely she’ll agree.)



1. DHV/Emotional Connection. These can be done right after you qualify her, during the attract phase. For example, Style’s Eliciting Values routines works great as a followup to the question “what are you passionate about?” But you can use these in isolation too.

  • ::: STYLE’S EV ::: (Taken from “Rules of The Game,” by Neil Strauss)
    1. Hey, as long as we’re talking, let’s do something interesting. Someone just did this with me recently. It’s a great, quick way to get to know someone. In fact, a lot of people don’t even know this about themselves. (What’s that?)
    2. It’s just three questions. It’s easy, and it’ll tell you what really drives and motivates you in life. (That would be cool. What’s the first question?)
    3. The first one is: If you had to choose one thing you need to have in your life in order to feel like life is worthwhile, what would it be? [OR name something you really enjoy doing.] (She answers)
    4. Okay, if you have {worthwhile thing} in your life, what kinds of things does that allow you to do or experience? [OR Describe your perfect experience of {worthwhile thing}. Either the best time you had doing it or your ideal scenario of {worthwhile thing}]. (She answers)
    5. Okay, imagine a time in the future or even now hen you have {worthwhile thing} in your life. And this enables you to do {use her words to paint a picture of worthwhile thing}. How would that make you feel inside? (I don’t know) You smiled as you were imagining it. What was that feeling you got inside? (names feeling)
    6. Yes, that’s it. {Feeling} is your core value. In other words, it’s what really motivates you. Some people say they want to be an actor, and they think it’s because they want to be famous. But the truth is, what they really want is to feel {feeling}. And it’s funny, because when we were talking about imagining it earlier, you actually felt it for a second. It was really cool. (She: Yeah, I did)
    7. Awesome. We fulfilled you life goal in five minutes. You can die now. (She laughs). But seriously–and this is the real lesson–whenever you have to make an important life decision, whether it’s about a job or a guy or a friend, just ask yourself if it brings you closer to that feeling. If it does, then you should pursue it. If it doesn’t, then you should move away from it. (She: Wow, that’s really interesting)
    8. That’ll be fifty dollars. I don’t do this shit for free you know.
  • ::: ROSS JEFFRIES’ “INSTANTANEOUS CONNECTION” PATTERN ::: The words in caps are words to emphasize slightly. They are “embedded commands” for a woman to feel those feelings.
    1. Have you ever felt an INSTANTANEOUS CONNECTION with someone? Like maybe as you were there, looking at them, and you started to LISTEN INTENTLY, it was like there was a CORD OF LIGHT going from you to them? And as that cord began to GLOW, WITH THE WARMTH of that connection, maybe you were even able to IMAGINE A TIME IN THE FUTURE, say six months from now, still FEELING THAT SENSE OF INCREDIBLE CONNECTION, and LOOKING BACK ON TODAY as having been the start of it? (She: Oh yeah)
    2. See, I think it’s so funny how some people can JUST DO THAT and LET IT HAPPEN because for me it takes longer. But I do find that in the course of an evening, as you REALLY LISTEN to someone, and you START TO RECOGNIZE those values in them that you hold so dearly for yourself… WITH ME that’s when you can MAKE THAT CONNECTION and FEEL THAT GROWING BOND.

2. Emotional Connection. This is the meat and potatoes of emotional connection. A lot of comfort is normal but interesting conversation, but to create an emotional connection it can be very helpful to sprinkle one or two of these routines.

  • ::: STYLE’S “SECRET SELF” ROUTINE ::: (Taken from “Rules of The Game,” by Neil Strauss)
    1. You know, a lot of people try to repress the parts of themselves they don’t like. But that never works. When you try to repress something, you’re basically pushing it down on a spring. Eventually, it’s going to release full force and take over your personality. It’s interesting, because a friend recently did this psychological test with me, and it taught me that instead of denying the parts of yourself you don’t like, there’s a better way to handle them. (What’s that?)
    2. I’ll tell you what. I’ll quickly do it with you. It’s just four questions. But for it to work, you have to be totally honest. (Okay)
    3. The first question is the toughest. What’s the part of your personality that you like the least? This is the part of yourself that you don’t like to show other people–your secret self–which maybe you sometimes even wish you could get rid of. (She says a negative trait)
    4. Okay, if you could give this part of you a name, what would it be? For example, a friend of mine said his problem was that he was too controlling, and he named this part of him Dexter. (Okay, I’ll call it —)
    5. Good. What does {name} look like? Describe her features and what she’s wearing. For example, my friend said Dexter was a red baby, floating in the air with a pitchfork and a forked tail like a devil. (She gives a description)
    6. Okay. Now here’s the key question. That part of ourselves that we don’t like probably once had a purpose that no longer serves us. So if we give it a new purpose that’s helpful to our lives, we don’t have to repress it anymore. For example, when my friend did the exercise, he had to find a useful job for his controlling nature. And since he’s an actor, he made Dexter his manager. So Dexter helps him rehearse, gets him to the set on time, critiques his performance, and drives him to make the right choices about his career. Another friend of mine had an anger problem, but now he uses that energy as his personal trainer in the gym to make him work our harder. So for {name}, what job can you give her that would be constructive to your life rather than destructive. (She give her a job)
    7. That’s perfect. So {name} cam be your {job}, and help you with your life rather than hindering it. It’s a pretty amazing exercise. I think we need to talk about something shallow now, though, like reality TV.
  • ::: THE CUBE ::: (Adapted from The Pickup Community)
  1. Have you ever done the cube? It’s a personality test. Once you do the cube, you can never do it again. It’s rumored to be of ancient Sufi origin. There’s no right or wrong. I’m just going to ask you to imagine a few things, and I’ll tell you what they mean afterwards. Cool?
  2. Imagine a landscape. And in the landscape there’s a cube. Do you see the cube? Is it big or is it small? Is it on the ground or is it floating in the air? Is it transparent, can you see through it or is it solid? Any particular color or design?
  3. Ok, add to this a ladder. See the ladder? Where is it in relation to the cube? Is it tall or is it short? Is it easy or hard to climb up it?
  4. Now, picture some flowers. Do you see a few or a lot? Where are they? Are they all one kind or different kinds? Okay, describe them. What do they look like? What color are they? And when you see them, what’s your first thought? How do they make you feel?
  5. Okay, add a horse. See the horse? Where is it? What’s it doing? What does it look like? If you gave me three words to describe the personality of this horse, what would they be?
  6. Okay last thing. Add to the picture a storm. See the storm? Is it violent or gentle? Where is it? Is it faraway or close up? Is it fucking shit up or is it more quiet?
  7. Do you want to know what all this means? I just made it up. It’s a joke. Are you mad? (laughs) No, I’m kidding. It actually means something. (joke ala Style)

Answer Key:

>>> 1. Cube : represents you. The bigger the cube, the bigger your ego. If the cube is transparent, you are open to others, you don’t hide anything from your friends or family. If you cannot see through the cube, it means that you are a private person and don’t talk much about yourself.

If the cube is made out of something solid and strong, it means that you are a strong person. If it is soft, it means that you can be easily influenced and you are emotional.

How you think about the cube represents how you think about yourself. A cube which is on the ground indicates that you are down to earth, while a floating cube shows that you are a dreamer. If you see the flat side of the cube, you have a shallow personality, if you see the cube in 3D, you have a deep personality.

If the cube is in the centre it means that you like the attention and you like to be praised.

The color of the cube represents your personality. In general, if the cube is light you are a positive person and the darker it is the more negative you are. However it may not always be so, you should always pay attention to how you feel about the color. If you like the color then you are a likeable personality, it the color seems cold to you, you seem distant to people.

Here is a general guide to the cube colors:

  • Black can represent the dark side.
  • White symbolizes innocence and a non-judgemental personality.
  • Red is the color of dominance and power.
  • Yellow color of the cube shows that the person loves attention. It also represents playfulness and optimism like the sun.
  • Green represents compassion.
  • Blue represents knowledge and calmness.
  • Purple represents luxury.
  • Brown shows stability. Brown is the most common cube color among men.

>>> 2. Ladder : The ladder represents your ambitions. If it’s easy to climb you might feel your ambitions are easy to attain, hard to climb and you might feel it’s difficult. Tall ladder is high ambitions, a low ladder is low ambitions. If the ladder is far away, your ambitions might feel distant, close to the cube and it’s attainable.

(The ladder can also represent your friends. The closer the ladder to the cube, the closer you are with your friends. If the ladder is leaning against the cube, this indicates that some friends are relying on you or expecting you to act according to their wishes.

If the ladder is far away from the cube, it may mean that you either have no friends or you don’t consider their friendship important to you. You either mentally or physically like to distance yourself from your friends. The more rungs the ladder has, the more friends you have.)

>>> 3. Flowers: Flower/s : The flower represents your children. If the flower is close to the cube, that means you are close to your children. Many flowers or no flowers represent whether you want lots of children or none. What you feel about the flowers indicates how you might feel about having children.

>>> 4. Horse : The horse represents your ideal partner and how you behave in relationships.

If it is a wild horse, it means that you give freedom to your partner, if the horse is tied it means you want to be in control and you always want to know where your partner is and what he/she is doing. If the horse is tied to the cube that shows that you are a very possessive person.

The distance between the cube and the horse shows how close or distant you are in relationships. How the horse behaves also shows what kind of partner you would like to have.

If the horse is running or does not stand for long in one place, it means that you want to have a partner that would like to travel, would be full of energy and would always be involved in something. If the horse does nothing but stands or eats, it means that you want to have a partner that likes to be at home and rarely travels.

The look of a horse can also indicate the physical features of your ideal partner. The better the appearance of the horse, the better looking partner you would like to have.

>>> 5. Storm : The storm is the problems in your life and how you deal with difficulties in life. If it is a big storm, then you always try to make a drama out of something. If the storm is small and far away from you, it means that you are a calm and positive person and you don’t like being angry and try to quickly shift your mood if you notice that anger gets activated in you.

The storm can also represent current problems in your life. If, whilst seeing storm in your mind’s eye, you think that it will stay there for a long time, you think the same way about your current problems.

If you see a big storm, it means that you currently experience big problems in your life. The proximity between the storm and the cube also shows how intensely these problems affect you.

8. Isn’t that cool? How accurate was it?

  1. Wanna take a psychological test? I’m gonna give you the psychological test to see how screwed up you are. (Notice the neg) It’s just four questions.
  2. 1) What’s your favorite color and three reasons why. Like what do you like about the color? What adjectives would you use to describe it?
  3. 2) If you could be any animal, which would it be and three reasons why. Like what are the three things you like best about the animal? How would you describe it?
  4. Okay the next two you have to use your imagination.
  5. 3) Imagine you’re in an all white room. No windows, no doors. Just you alone in this white room. What are three feelings you’re feeling. First things that come to mind.
  6. 4) Imagine you’re waist high in water, any pleasant water that comes to mind. What are three feelings you’re feeling.
  7. Ready for what it means?
  8. 1) Your favorite color is the impression you give off to others, how others perceive you.
  9. 2) The animal you picked is who you are, how you really view yourself.
  10. 3) The white room is how you feel about death. Have you ever heard of those people who had a near death experience? You know what they say they saw? Exactly, a white light. And when you die you have to do it alone, and there’s no escaping it. That’s why there’s no windows or doors. So your answers make perfect sense.
  11. 4) The water is how you feel about sex. In psychology they connect water to sex, probably has something to do with the exchange of bodily fluids. But anyway, that’s how you feel about sex.
  12. Pretty cool. Then I go into a story about how I first learned this test. My freshman year in college, my roommate’s aunt who was a professor of English gave us this test. And for the last question I said I just want to keep going further and further. I was so embarrassed. Can sometimes lead into a discussion about sex, death or their personality…
  • ::: FOUR PERSONS :::
    1. I gotta share this really cool thing with you. Are you into personality tests at all? Well, there’s this theory by that there’s basically four types of people in the world. We can find out which person you are. It’s three basic questions.
    2. Question #1. Do you consider yourself to be more introverted or extroverted? For example, if you felt like you had to recharge your batteries, would being alone recharge your batteries or would you prefer to be out among people?
    3. Question #2. Do you consider yourself to be more emotional or rational? For example, if you had a major decision to make, would you get out a piece of paper and write out pros and cons, or would you go by what your feelings told you?
    4. Question #3. Think back to one of the best relationships you had. It doesn’t have to be with a boyfriend. It can be with a best friend or a sibling or a parent or whatever. Got it? How did that person make you feel? Powerful? The center of attention? Smart? Valued?
    5. Okay, what I’m going to do now and tell you the four persons. And tell me which one YOU think you are. Not what others might say you are. But what you think you are.
    6. I’ll draw a square on a napkin with a line down the middle vertically and through the middle horizontally. At the top I write: RATIONAL. At the bottom I write: EMOTIONAL. On the right I write: EXTROVERTED. On the left I write: INTROVERTED. Top right quadrant: Red, Top left: Blue, Bottom left: green, Bottom right: yellow.
    7. The first person is called “Red.” These people make the best CEOs. They like to take charge and be the boss. They’re not afraid of confrontation. They can be a little arrogant and pushy and assertive but they tend not to be the best listeners. Their key emotion is to feel powerful. Red is power. They’re Rational and Extroverted.
    8. The second person is called “Blue.” These people make the best psychoanalysts and professors. They enjoy studying and reading and knowing and analyzing. They’re more calm. Sometimes they can be a little indecisive. Their key emotion is to feel intelligent. Blue is like the sky, abstract or bird’s eye view. They’re Rational and Introverted.
    9. The third person is called “Green.” These people make the best poets and artists. They’re more the peacemakers. They don’t like confrontation, but like to get along. They make the best listeners. They’re supportive, and don’t like to be the center of attention. They tend not to be super assertive, and can get taken advantage of. Their key emotion is to feel valued. Green is associated with peace. They’re Emotional and Introverted.
    10. The fourth person is called “Yellow.” These people make the best actors. They’re the most fun people. They like to be the center of attention. They’ like being in the mix of things and feel excited and inspired. They can get distracted a little easily, their attention goes wherever the most excitement is. Their key emotion is feel important or the center of attention. Yellow is like the sunshine. Bright and happy. They’re Emotional and Extroverted.
    11. Yellow is the complete opposite of Blue. And Red is the complete opposite of Green.
    12. Okay, out of all those, which one do you think you’re more like? Again what YOU think, not what others say you are.
    13. (Point out how their answers to the first three questions match which person they picked.)
    14. So, here’s the thing. The theory says we’re all born with a temperament, and we lead with that one. But we actually have all four colors in us. We also have a secondary personality. Which do you think is your secondary color?
    15. So, your third is probably…
    16. Jung thought your secondary can never be your opposite. In the rare case that it is, you’re either crazy or a genius. But your object in life is to integrate more of the fourth color with your primary. So, if your primary color is — that means you need to integrate more of the (fourth color). For example (list some of the characteristics of the fourth personality). Jung would say once you do that, you become a more whole, integrated human being.
    17. Isn’t that cool? Now, which one do you think I am?
    18. Oh my God, we’re totally compatible! We should get married right now.
  • ::: THE QUESTION GAME ::: (Taken from “Mystery Method,” by Mystery, and I put in my own questions as well as questions from “The Book of Questions” by Gregory Stock)
    1. Have you ever played the Question Game? Well, there are RULES…
    2. Rule One, you ask a question, then me, then you, and so on, back and forth.
    3. Rule Two, you have to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Like truth and dare because I don’t know how weird you really are. (Notice the neg)
    4. Rule Three, you can’t ask the same question that’s already been asked.
    5. Rule Four, you have to ask questions that let skeletons out of the closet. Take advantage of our anonymity.
    6. Oh, and Rule Five… you go first. (She: That’s not fair!)
    7. (The following are some possible questions. You can create your own of course. You probably don’t need more than 10 questions.)
    8. How many boyfriends have you had?
    9. Tell me a secret.
    10. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
    11. If I were to look in your DVD player right now, what would I find?
    12. If you were down what would you watch as your comfort food movie?
    13. If I were to look on your iPhone, what would I see on your playlist?
    14. What is your most favorite place that you’ve visited?
    15. If you had to get away from it all, just to get settled down, where would you go?
    16. Ever had a rough breakup?
    17. Ever been to the ER?
    18. Ever performed on stage?
    19. When did you first get drunk?
    20. Can you cook?
    21. What’s your favorite food?
    22. What’s your favorite store to shop in?
    23. If I could grant you any superpower, what would it be?
    24. If you could be invisible for a day, what would you do?
    25. If you had a penis for a day, what would you do?
    26. If you could kiss any of your girlfriends, who would it be and why?
    27. If you could fuck any guy here, who would it be and why?
    28. How long should a girl wait before having sex?
    29. What’s the craziest place you’ve had sex?
    30. You know, when a guy first fingers a girl he usually only uses one finger, but the girl almost always asks for two, sometimes three. Do you think a guy should start off with one finger or two?
    31. If you woke up tomorrow anywhere in the world, where would it be?
    32. If you could take a one-month trip anywhere in the world and money were not a consideration, where would you go and what would you do?
    33. Let’s say you’re all alone and you have no fear of being laughed at or looked down upon by others, what sorts of things would you do?
    34. If you were as outgoing and uninhibited as you want, what would you like to do?
    35. You’ve been given the ability to travel to any period in history, where would you go? Would you do anything to change the course of history? Would you come back?
    36. You’ve been given the ability to travel to any period in the future, where would you go?  Would you do anything to change the course of history? Would you come back?
    37. Let’s say a millionaire will donate a million dollars to you or to a charity of your choice IF you step—completely naked—from a car onto a busy downtown street, walk four blocks, and climb back into the car. There is absolutely no risk of bodily danger. Would you do it?  It begs the question how comfortable we are with our bodies? What’s the big deal about being naked—that’s how we were born.
    38. If you were to wake up on a warm morning by yourself in the nude and were going to laze around the house, how long would you wait to put clothes on? I think it’s great when a woman is comfortable with her body—there’s nothing sexier or confident in the world.
    39. If you could choose anyone in the world—living or dead—to be your dinner guest tonight, who would you choose? What about as your friend and as your lover? Which begs the question, what do you look for in a friend that you might not want in a lover? And what do you seek in a lover that you haven’t found yet, or that you had once but want to find again? (…And also, what did your last boyfriend not get about you?)
    40. If you could script the basic plot of the dream you’ll have tonight, what would the story be about? Or, what would you want your dream to tell you tonight?
    41. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
    42. You’ve just found out that you’re going to die next year suddenly. If you knew this, is there anything you would change about the way you’re living now?
    43. If a genie came along and *poof* could make you be anything in the world you wanted to be (without fear of failure—rock star, supermodel, whatever) what would it be? And don’t say princess.
    44. If you could choose any art to do, what would it be and what would it be about?
    45. What would you do if money were no object?
    46. Is there something you’ve dreamed of doing for awhile? Why haven’t you done it?
    47. If you came across a genie one day and he could give you any wish, what would it be? And don’t say I wish for more wishes.
    48. If a genie gave you a million dollars, what would you do with it?
    49. What do you want to be when you grow up? And don’t say princess.
    50. What’s your favorite Disney movie?
    51. What was your favorite children’s book?
    52. Who was your childhood idol?
    53. Have you ever wished you were of the opposite sex? Which do you think has it easier in our culture, men or women? And what do you think is the main difference between men and women? Is the difference inherited or learned?
    54. Have you had satisfying sex in the last three months? If so, what made it good or less than good? Or, what’s the best sexual experience you’ve ever had? What makes great sex for a woman? I’ll tell you what makes great sex for a guy—enthusiasm. Not just a girl who lies there like a dead fish. But a girl who gives it her all, who really gets into it, isn’t afraid to make noises, scream, let loose, be uninhibited, willing to experiment…there was this survey done on guys that asked what they would like to see their woman do more of. One of the top 3 or 5 things wasn’t anything kinky at all but something as simple as a girl letting her guy go down on her. That letting loose, enthusiasm really turns us on. I’ll tell you, there’s nothing sexier in the world for a guy, than a woman in ecstasy?
    55. Do you believe in any sort of God? If not, and you found yourself in a life-threatening situation, would you still pray? What about angels and spirits? Do you believe in these at all?
    56. If you were going on a long trip, would you roll your clothes, fold your clothes, or just throw them into your suitcase?
    57. In conversations, do you tend to talk or listen more? What kinds of things do you usually talk about, or like to talk about?
    58. Does the fact that you’ve never tried something before increase or decrease its appeal to you?
    59. (These are my personal turn-offs) Do you have tattoos?
    60. Do you smoke, drink, do drugs?
    61. Do you like horror movies?
    62. What’s the craziest place you’ve had sex?
    63. Who was your best lover?
    64. What was your best sexual experience?
    65. What was the one thing your last boyfriend didn’t get about you?
    66. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
    67. What is the greatest disappointment in your life?
    68. If you could change anything about the way that you were raised, what would it be?
    69. What is your most treasured memory?
    70. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
    71. What do you fantasize about when you masturbate?
    72. Have you ever been attracted to a woman?
    73. How often do you masturbate?
    74. What’ do you like best about sex?
    75. What’s your favorite position?

3. Your Grounding Story. This is part of the meat and potatoes, too.

  • ::: YOUR GROUNDING STORY ::: Credit: Mystery
  • When your girl asks “what do you?” your Grounding Story is the response. Instead of saying something factual like “writer” or “doctor” or “waiter” you can tell her a story that helps her relate to you better. It grounds your identity to her reality.
    1. Well, when I was little I wanted to be… (Tell stories and ambitions as a child)
    2. When I was a teenager (What may have changed in adolescence… maybe an obstacle to overcome)
    3. Now I’m a writer and where I’m going next (what I’m doing now and what I want to do next, what I ultimately want to do).
  • A trick I learned from Mehow: at each story point in the way, ask about her childhood, her teenage years, where she is now and where she wants to go. This makes is interactive, and you get to learn about her.
  • Also, Lance Mason has a great variation on this. Instead of telling the story factually, you can tell your Grounding Story in terms of a metaphor. For example, comparing your life to a caterpillar in a cocoon on the verge of breaking free. What does your life feel like? What image is it like, an image anyone can relate to?

4. Pre-Empt Last Minute Resistance. To avoid last minute resistance later down the line in the bedroom, set the right frame early on during comfort. Also, if you want to let her know you date multiple women, let her know early on during comfort.

  • ::: THE WORD SLUT IS BULLSHIT ::: (Improvised, based on Lance Mason)
  • The word slut is such bullshit. There’s no equivalent word for a guy. Call a guy a slut and it’s like a compliment. For a girl it’s degrading. I think it’s awesome when a girl doesn’t play by those outdated standards. A girl who’s spontaneous and adventurous. There’s nothing sexier in the world.
    • BANTER. Banter that you have multiple girlfriends, or lots of girls chasing you. See Brad P’s “Eight Girlfriend” Routine for an example. It’s listed under “V. Do You Have a Girlfriend?” in “4. Contingencies” in A2 Attract, Part 1 of 2 (Banter)
    • I’M POLYAMOROUS. (Credit: Joshua Pelletier from “How to Date Multiple Women”)
      • You: “How did your last relationship end? (Ask pen-ended questions about her last relationship)
      • She: “Oh, he was jealous. It ended. Whatever.”
      • You: “I don’t have that problem anymore because I changed something about the way I’m in relationships now. But yeah… I remember what that was like and it completely sucks!”
      • She: Talking about jealousy, fear, lying, apathy, or selfishness.
      • You: “You know that doesn’t happen in a polyamorous relationship. Have you ever considered just being polyamorous with guys that make you feel that way?”
      • OR… You: “That guy over there seems to be digging you. You want me to introduce you to him? Seriously. You can hookup with any guy you want to. I’m polyamorous. I’m completely comfortable with that.”
      • She: “What is polyamory?”
      • You: “Well, poly means many and amory means love or lovers, so polyamory technically means I have many loves or many lovers, many girlfriends at the same time.” Sometimes I might add “I have many girlfriends or many lovers, and if I meet someone not comfortable with it, I don’t date them. I am completely open and they all know about each other ahead of time.”
      • If she’s not cool with it, then you don’t date her.
        • Objection #1: “I could never do that.”
        • Response: “You know, it’s not for everybody, but if you ever meet a guy who’s confident enough as a man, comfortable enough in being polyamorous and who’s actually really good at it, then I highly suggest you try it out. I really think you should. It’s one of the most amazing experi- ences. A lot of women that are dating me are doing it for the first time. They haven’t done it with any other man though some of them have other guys that they’re dating and that’s awesome. There aren’t a whole lot of guys that know how to do it right, but if you ever run into another one, I highly suggest you try it out.”
        • She: “Okay, yeah, I’ll try that out” (they will),
        • You: continue talking as if nothing has changed.
        • Objection #2: “Are you sleeping with all of them?”Response: “Well, yeah, most of them. I mean I’m not going to date them and then depriving them of sex. But we also agree to have a complete 100% protection rule. We always use protection. But, yeah, I’m sleeping with most of them.”
        • Objection #3: “What kind of girl would actually do that?”
        • Response: “Girls like you, girls that are confident enough, comfortable with me, and trust me. They’re no different than you or some of the other girls in this place. Most of the girls with me are polyamorous for the first time. They don’t have a lot of experience with it outside of me. But for some reason, they are just really comfortable with me.”
        • Objection #4: “Do they all know about each other?”
        • Response: “Absolutely. It usually comes up in the first five minutes of talking to a girl. And they’re completely comfortable with it. I can tell pretty quickly if a girl is comfortable with it or not. It’s very important that if she’s not comfortable with it or she’s not interested in learning how to be comfortable with it, then I don’t date her. I don’t sleep with her, nothing.”
        • OR: Do they all know about each other? Yeah, of course, they do and if they don’t, I don’t date them at all.
        • Objection #5: “So you’re cheating then?”
        • Response: “Well, no, I’m not cheating. These girls all know about each other and they all know that I’m sleeping with others. They are all completely cool with it.”
        • OR: “No one is cheating. There is no cheating. You cannot cheat. If anyone tried to cheat they wouldn’t be able to because there is no commitment, so there is no cheating.”
        • Objection #6: “So you never want to get married?”
        • Response: “Of course, I want to get married. I definitely do. But the girls that I’m dating are not the girl I am going to marry. They’re just not the one for me. I’m not going to settle for anything less than absolutely perfect for me. I don’t think they should either. Neither of us think that we’re right for each other, long term, and we’re both very honest about that. Someday I will meet a girl that is perfect for me in every way. I hope I get married to her.”
        • OR: “No, I don’t ever want to get married. This is perfectly fine. I’m very happy with this lifestyle and the girls that I’m with are very happy and someday they’ll probably get married and they’ll leave and that’s okay.”
        • Objection #7: “What kind of girls are these girls?”
        • Response: “Well, they are from all sorts of walks of life. There’s a girl that I’m dating that’s a profes- sional kite boarder. She’s really athletic. There’s a girl that I’m dating that is in poetry school. There’s a girl that I’m dating that’s a barista. There’s a girl that I’m dating that’s a doctor at a hospital. There’s a girl that I’m dating that is a stripper, one that’s a hippie, and another that’s a poker dealer at a casino.”
        • If you don’t have any girlfriends: “Are you sleeping with all of them?”… “No, not all of them”, is perfectly fine. “What kind of girls are they?”…  “The girls I’ve dated in the past are from all walks of life.”
      • • #1. Ask her opinion of other girls: “What do you think about that girl?” “Do you think she is cute?”
        • #2. Fish for jealousy: “That girl is hot.”OR: Approach another girl with her: “Hey we were just talking about how cute you are.”If she get jealous, bad sign. She won’t be okay with you sleeping with other girls.
      • •#3. Don’t be available: “Hey, I won’t be available to hang out until Thursday.”If she ever asks you to cancel plans, this is a problem. Reinforce polyamory: “I don’t cancel plans for you but I’ll around Thursday night. Remember this is a polyamorous relationship. I’m still here for you, but on my own terms.” If that doesn’t work, run. You’ve got a jealous girl.• #4. Don’t build rapport too fast: Get things sexual fast. THEN build rapport. Too much rapport before sex can lead to hurt feelings, confusion or anger. Keep the emotional connection mellow, until later.
      • AFTER SEX:
      • It’s okay to cuddle and connect with her. But connect like a friend, not a boyfriend. Keep things light with some fun banter, or go into normal conversation or light rapport, not the deep rapport.
      • DON’T make any plans with her. She can tell you about her problems, she can ask your advice, she can share what is going on in her life, but once she starts trying to talk about her future with you, cut it off. Make it clear that this relationship is not shifting into monogamy.If you can, let her stay. Have breakfast. If she needs a ride, give her one. Once she leaves, keep searching.

5. Kino. Kino gradually becomes more intimate in comfort. Push the boundaries slightly, but not too much. More specifically, move from touching her on the arms and hands to her legs.

  • Touch her leg with your leg
  • Touch her leg with your hand
  • Lean in to smell her while her arm is in yours for example, “Man, you smell so fucking good.” Then back off, “You know what I’m not even in that head space” OR “Mm, Mm, no, none of that now.”
  • Dance
  • Kiss



In my experience, you don’t need any of these routines to kiss a woman, except for the triangular gaze. You can actually go for a kiss within 20 minutes of meeting her! If you’ve been doing kino all along and she’s laughing and having a great time, she wants to be kissed. Just don’t make out… yet. Break off the kiss first. Keep the sexual tension alive. The kiss is simply comfort building. Save making out and foreplay for when you’re alone.

So, really these routines are just training wheels. Again, if she’s laughing, talking with you, giving you her attention, you can lean in and kiss her. But if you don’t feel comfortable doing that yet, here are some ways to keep your mouth moving while you make the move. Again, the most important routine here is the last one… the triangular gaze. And remember, be the one to break off the kiss first. Keep her chasing.

1. Romantic Questions. These questions can shift the conversation from casual to romantic.

  • BEST BOYFRIEND: Who was your best boyfriend and why?
  • LAST BOYFRIEND: What was the one thing your last boyfriend didn’t get about you?
  • MOVIE ACTOR: Which actor do you find most attractive and why?
  • LOVER VS. FRIEND: What do you look for in a lover that you don’t look for in a friend?
  • IDEAL DATE: I was reading about this romantic date and it was amazing. Imagine this: you’re out with a man you really like and find really attractive. You are sitting in this gorgeous outdoor restaurant, overlooking a lake. The autumn colors are just perfect. The air is fresh and smells so great, you feel like you don’t even need to eat, just sit there and breathe that sweet air. Anyway, that’s how the book put it. And you have this incredible date as the sun goes down over the water, the stars come out and then the moon rises, and the two of you feel so connected, so in love, you know what I mean? What would you say is your most romantic moment ever? (Credit: How to Succeed with Women, by Ron Louis & David Copeland)
  • ATTRACTED: What does it feel like when you’re really, really attracted to a man?
  • IN LOVE: what does it feel like when you’re in love? How do you know when you are in love?
  • KISSING: What’s your favorite thing about kissing?

2. Ross Jeffries’ Patterns. You don’t need these. But they can set a woman’s mood for sex beautifully.

    1. I was watching the most interesting show on the Discovery Channel about roller coasters. They were interviewing this guy who designs rides for amusement parks and he said there are 3 things that go into designing one: you need excitement, safety, and fascination.
    2. Excitement: You know that first long, slow vertical climb on the roller coaster? You can feel the adrenaline pounding through your body as your body shudders with anticipation? The closer you get to the peak, the faster your heart beats and the faster your breathing moves. You’re scared as hell but you also feel this growing excitement, like this tingling in your stomach. And when you reach the peak, you surrender to the drop and scream with excitement.
    3. Safety: At the same time you have to feel safe and secure, so you can trust that being on the ride, you’re not going to get hurt. You have to know that this roller coaster is so secure and strong  and safe that you’re not going to get hurt. You feel so totally safe and secure that you can let go. It’s the comfort and safety that allows you to feel excitement.
    4. Fascination: Lastly, if you want to get back on the ride and do it again, you’ve also got to feel a sense of fascination and unpredictability. This ride has to have so many twists and turns that you don’t know what’s going to happen next, but you know it’s going to be good. As soon as you get off, you just want to climb back on and take it again and again, multiple times.
  • ::: BLOW JOB :::
    1. Step one: Compulsion vs. Anticipation. I find it so interesting that whole subject of how people connect with their desires and their hopes and dreams. You know, it reminds me of this article I was reading about compulsion. And it got me to thinking about the differences between compulsion and anticipation.
    2. Step two: Define Compulsion. Compulsion is when you do something without even thinking about it. Like, you ever find yourself just reaching for the refrigerator? And before you know it, your hand is already on that door handle and you’re looking in the refrigerator and you stop and think, “Oh my God, what am I doing here?” Well, that’s an example of compulsion.
    3. Step three: Define Anticipation with 3 Examples. But anticipation is where your mind anticipates pleasure before it actually arrives.
    4. Example 1: Bath/Shower. For example, you ever come home from a really rotten day at work? All you can think about is dropping every stitch of clothing and climbing into that steaming hot bath or shower. And before you can even get in, you can already imagine that heat working its way through every part of your body. And then there comes that actual moment, that moment of sliding in, where you just release completely, and let that pleasure take you completely.
    5. Example 2: Chocolate. Or another example might be… do you like chocolate? What’s your favorite kind of chocolate? Well, do you ever get a piece of chocolate; instead of eating it right away you save a piece, you put it aside and you think about it all day long. You think about what it would be like to put this in your mouth, where you tease yourself, you hold it right in front of your lips. ANd you begin to imagine the soft, creamy texture against your tongue. You imagine that first moment where that first molecule, sweet, touches your taste cubs. YOu imagine that moment where you just… wrap your tongue around this and there’s this explosion of pleasure, like an orgasm, in your mouth.
    6. Example 3: First Kiss. The other example I can think of is, have you ever been with someone and you both know there’s a real attraction here but you don’t say anything? There’s that moment where you stop talking and you just lock eyes with that person… and you know there’ something about to happen. You begin to… imagine that first wonderful kiss. You imagine that first soft brush of the lips. So soft you’re not even sure you’re kissing yet? And then there comes that moment where you do begin that first kiss and there’s that jolt of electricity that just goes shooting through you?
    7. Step Four: Conclusion. See, I think what happens is that the conscious mind can go down into the unconscious and come back with all these… idea and fantasies… and thoughts. See, being very intellectual, I used to think all my thoughts came from above me, but now I know so much of the important thoughts come from below me, Debbie, because you’re coming from a much deeper place from inside your mind.
  • ::: BLAMMO :::
    1. Step One: Discovery Channel
    2. Step Two: Instantaneous Connection
    3. Step Three: Sub-modality. See, everything in the mind has a structure to it, even the experience of connecting with someone. I learned this really cool things about NLP, a form of psychotherapy that was mixed with hypnosis back in the 70s. Okay, check this out. Think about someone you really like for a second. Got that? Now point to where you see that person in your mind. Okay now think of someone you don’t like that much, maybe someone who’s made you feel bad about yourself. Now watch this. Take that picture of the person you don’t like and try as hard as you can to move it over into the place in your mind where you see the person you do like. See that? It doesn’t want to move, right? Because you need a way to sort out who your really like from who you don’t. Isn’t that cool?
    4. Step Four: Visualization. Okay, now here’s something else NLP developed. It’s called visualization. See if you can remember a time when you were feeling exquisite pleasure in your body. Look at yourself as if you were on a movie screen. Can you see yourself? Okay, now instead of looking at yourself, enter into your body as if you were there. See the colors you’d see, the scents you’d smell, the sounds, the tastes, the feel of your skin. Now, the second felt more real, right? This works great in everyday life. Because focus on negative thoughts, and it puts you in a bad mood and creates a negative reality. Focus on positive thoughts, and it lifts your spirits and creates success.
    5. Step Five: Anchoring. Now, here’s the final piece to NLP. It’s called anchoring. If you want to snap out of a bad mood, this can help. Have you ever heard a song that had good memories associated with it, and instantly you’re there in that good memory. Same idea. You combine a great feeling with a sound or touch. Repeat that sound and touch and you’re supposed to feel those feelings again. So, here, let’s try it out for shits and giggles. Close your eyes. Feel that exquisite pleasure in your body again, as if you were there in your body. See how what you saw, hear what you heard, feel how it felt. Just feel wonderful. Take all the time you’d like. And when those feelings of exquisite pleasure reach their peak, lift your thumb for me. (Touch her on inside of wrist or elbow) Perfect. And just hand on for a minute to how good it feels. Great. Okay, open your eyes and look at me. Close your eyes again and put your mind back into that place. Let your mind go. Surrender to how good it feels. Feel how wonderful your skin feels, smell the lovely scents, taste the tastes, hear the sounds. As you feel those feelings build and they reach their peak, lift your thumb for me. (Touch her on the same spot) Great. Hold onto those feelings as you open your eyes and look at me. All right, now the third time is the magic time. So, close your eyes again and allow yourself to enjoy that experience so deeply. Notice how every inch of your skin feels. Notice every sound, whisper, sigh, whatever sound you hear, every feeling, and all the things you’re seeing, the colors. And as it begins to reach its peak, life up that thumb and let me know. (Touch) Great. Now hold onto those feelings and really enjoy them. Open your eyes and look at me. Now, as I said the idea behind anchoring is when you combine a feeling with a touch or a sound, and when you repeat that touch or sound, you’ll feel that feeling again. So, if I were to say to you, you know, I fund that when I spend time with someone, and I really start to feel that sense of incredible connection, maybe then you can feel just perfect (Touch). And that feels great, doesn’t it? Isn’t this interesting? Isn’t the mind really cool?
    6. Step Six: In Love Sub-modality. Now notice something else. You ever just fall head over heels in love with someone? As you’re remembering that time, point to where you see that picture. (Touch) So watch… as you think about that space remember his voice… and allow his voice to come from that space. It’s like the warmth of his voice, the deep, rich warmth of it just starts to penetrate your consciousness, and spread all through your body. As your heart beats faster and your breathing increases, the warmth just heats up into a fire. A fire spreading through your chest and down through your belly. A fire pounding and pulsating all through you, down to where you really long to have it go. Until that desire for him just becomes utterly overwhelming and you just surrender to it completely.
  • ::: LOVE VS. IN LOVE :::
    1. Have you ever thought about the difference between attraction and being in love?
    2. Could you say they take place in different settings? Attraction is what you experience in the presence of that person. But falling in love is when you’re not in that person’s presence. For example, remember a time when you just totally fell for someone. Remember what that feels like?
    3. So, what may have happened was you spent some time with him, had a great time, and when you went home, you thought about him. You list all the qualities about him that you like. Then you get that feeling, right in the pit of your stomach that starts to spread out and you feel those feelings of love for him. Can you feel that as I describe it to you?
    4. And then here’s the kicker. You start saying his name out loud, bringing it up in conversations with friends, dance around the house, singing his name… hehe
    5. It’s almost like falling in love is a process. And when you do that process with someone, and let it happen, that’s when the magic takes over, the magic we’re all really looking for. The real magic is when it happens instantly and you know it right away. That’s an incredible feelings, right?
    1. Phase One: Eliciting Her Relationship Values. What’s most important to you in a relationship? (She: Mutual admiration). That is an important one. How do you know when you have mutual admiration? (She: examples, experiences, stories, feelings) I agree… that’s a powerful one. Well, what else is important to you in a relationship? (She: sense of humor… NOTE: this is a quality, not a value. Steer her to values) Well, I know that’s an important quality fir a person to have, but what does a person’s sense of humor allow you to experience that you wouldn’t otherwise experience? (She: fun and enjoyment) Of course… why be with someone if they’re no fun? And what has to happen for you to know you’ve got fun and enjoyment with someone. Do you have examples? (She: examples, experience, stories, feelings) Wow.. that would be great to be with someone like that. Well, what else is important to you in a relationship? (She: trust) Wow… that is an important one. How do you know when you have trust with someone. (She: examples, experiences, stories, feelings)
    2. Phase Two: Ranking values from MOST to LEAST important. Of those three values, mutual admiration, fun, and trust, which is most important? If you could only pick one, which one would it be? (She: fun and enjoyment) Well, I could see that. Of mutual admiration and trust, which is more important? (Her: mutual admiration)
    3. Phase Three: Later on (Hours or weeks later). I think we’ve got the start of something here, and I think it’s based on fun and enjoyment, trust, and mutual admiration. Isn’t it a wonderful thing to experience?
    4. And  BE that need she wants fulfilled.

3. Sexual Subjects. These will get a woman thinking about the pleasures of sex within normal conversation. Best to wait to bring these up after you’ve created an emotional connection with a woman.

  • ::: STYLE’S “NANCY FRIDAY” ROUTINE ::: (From Rules of the Game, by Neil Strauss)
    1. Women are so much more fascinating than men. For example, there was this professor in the sixties who wrote a book and said that women were incapable of sexual fantasies. (She: That’s not—)
    2. I know, exactly. Obviously it’s not true. So this woman named Nancy Friday wrote a book in response called “My Secret Garden.” And to disprove his theory, she interviewed hundreds of women about their sexual fantasies. Where men’s fantasies are handed to them on a silver platter and encouraged, making most of them pretty much the same, women live this much more exciting and varied fantasy life. I think this is because women’s sexuality is often repressed when they’re found. They’re told “That’s bad.” So their sexuality is held back, and eventually starts to flower in dynamic, wonderful ways. (She: That’s interesting)
    3. Yea, so Nancy Friday interviewed these women who were basically in relationships where they have even had oral sex and had sex only in the missionary position, and they had these wild fantasy lives. So she says that a woman’s mind is like a house. And each room contains a different fantasy. There’s the anonymous sex room. There’s being with other women, being watch by an audience, being dominated, being a prostitute, or even transforming during sex into something or someone else. Obviously not every woman has all these rooms in her mind. Like, for example, when you’re alone and thinking about something that gets you excited–and it doesn’t have to be anything you’ve ever done or would ever do in real life–do you think about something that’s in one of those rooms, or something completely different? (She: I guess–)
    4. It’s funny. A lot of people think things that get them excited but actually want them to remain just fantasies. Like, I dated someone whose fantasy was to be on stage strapped in stirrups in this mechanical device, while these robots had sex with her and an auditorium full of doctors in white lab coats watched. (Pause) And, no, we never did end up doing that. (She: Describes her fantasy)
    5. That’s interesting. It’s amazing. Women can have all these different kinds of orgasms–vaginal, clitoral, blended, full-body–and usually they can have many of them, back to back. While a lot of guys only get this one little release that isn’t nearly as pleasurable. So you’d think it would be women who chase men for sex and not the opposite.
    6. Change to a nonsexual topic to allow her to think those thoughts…
  • ::: NY TIMES ARTICLE ON FEMALE DESIRE ::: (Based on January 25, 2009 article I read in The New York Times Magazine by Daniel Bergner)
    1. I just read the most fascinating article in The New York Times about female desire.
    2. 3 females scientists tried to figure out how it works. Scientists. FEMALE scientists. Here’s the problem they were tying to solve.
    3. There was this experiment done where straight guys and girls and gay guys and girls watched the same videos of: straight couple having sex, 2 guys, 2 girls, naked girl doing aerobics, naked guy walking down beach, bonobos having sex. Their desire was measured objectively and subjectively. Objectively the guys had an apparatus over their penis to gauge swelling. Girls had a plastic probe in their vagina to measure blood flow and moisture through their walls. Subjectively, the guys and girls had to rate how aroused they were after watching a scene.
    4. Guys were straightforward. Subjective and objective measurements matched. Sexual orientation matched. No arousal at the bonobos.
    5. Women were a whole different ball game. Their genitalia reacted more to the bonobos than to the naked guy walking. They reacted more to 2 girls than 2 guys. Not only that, the lesbians said their desire was low for the straight couple, but their genitalia said otherwise. The straight girls said their desire was low for the lesbian couple, but their genitalia said otherwise.
    6. Why did their vaginas differ from their words? And why they get turned on by bonobos?
    7. One scientist thought it was because women’s desire is actually in their minds, not in their bodies. Their bodies were more like an evolutionary mechanism to detect sex. The naked man who was not erect didn’t give off sex signals, but the bonobos did.
    8. The second scientist argued women’s desire happens through emotional connection or intimacy, not sexual preference. That explains why women didn’t respond according to their listed orientation. Women’s orientation transcends labels.
    9. The third scientist said women’s desire is narcissistic. Her desire comes from being desired. This explains why the naked woman turned her on more than the naked man. She imagined she was that desirable woman, and the thought of being desired aroused her. This also explains why the #1 sexual fantasy women have is to be raped or dominated. Because the man desires her so much, he loses all control for her, and this turns her on. As well as she gets to be dominated.
    10. The conclusion? No one knows what women want, not even women who are scientists. But that’s exactly what I love about women. They’re a mystery to be solved. They are desire itself. And they want a man who knows how to allow her let go and just unleash her desire.

GOING FOR THE KISS. You can kiss her within 20 minutes. The kiss is just comfort building. I’m repeating myself, but these routines are just training wheels. You don’t need them, except for probably the triangular gaze.

    1. Oh my God you smell good, what are you wearing? (She tells you) Oh my God that smells good. (Smell her near her shoulders up toward her ears) It’s funny because animals when they mate, they get all the information they need about someone just from the scent. Scent tells us so much. And I don’t think we guys value it enough. A woman’s sense of smell is 40 times better than a guy’s. And the animal part of us is actually wired to respond when someone smells us.
    2. And the thing I miss most about having hair OR the thing something I really love is when someone reaches up and grabs your hair and just pulls it from behind. (As you say this, go up the back of her neck, get a good chunk, pull it back fairly hard) It’s great because you’ll notice that lions, when they’re mating will actually bite the back of each other’s manes and they’re wired to respond to this. Or cats will pick each other by the scruff of the neck.
    3. What’s fascinating is that the parts of your body that bend the most have the most nerve endings and the parts that you see the least are the most sensitive, like behind the elbow (touch behind her elbow), the knee (touch behind her knee). I don’t know if anyone’s done this to you or not but if you bite the crease in there it’s the best feeling in the world. And next time you’re with a guy you should have him try that. (She: Why aren’t you trying that?) Okay, what the hell. (Bite her inner elbow. Take a big chunk of skin and bring it slowly and firmly together. She gets the chills)
    4. You know what the best thing in the world is? Is biting on the neck, right here on the side of the neck. This has to do with the fact that it is where the jugular vein is most exposed and since most sexual fantasies have to do with submission and vulnerability, it sends all the fantasy signals flying. Bite my neck. (50% of the time she won’t. If she doesn’t…) Okay. (Turn away for 5 seconds) Bite my neck. (She’ll bite your neck) Oh my God on a scale of 1 -10, that’s a 6. Here’s how you bite. (Bite her neck) Okay try again.
    5. Triangular gaze, and kiss.
    6. NOTE: You don’t need all this preamble. It’s just to keep your mouth running in case you’re nervous. You can cut right to the triangular gaze and the kiss.
  • ::: I’M TRYING SO HARD NOT TO KISS YOU ::: (Credit: Style and Mystery)
    1. God, I’m trying so hard NOT to kiss you right now. Stop looking at me like that. (If she holds eye contact or looks down shyly, go for the kiss.)
  • ::: TRIANGULAR GAZE ::: 
    1. Push hair out of her eyes or touch necklace
    2. For one second each, look at her left eye, then her right eye, and finally her lips, and back to eyes. Blink slowly, look deeply, and shut up.
    3. For the kiss, go 90% of the way, and let her come other 10%.
    4. Don’t kiss too long. Keep it short, sweet, and light. Leave her wanting more.


The best way to extract her is by first “bouncing” her to another venue. Invite to go to the bar across the street. Or get pizza or something. When you enter a new place together, you get that “couple” feel. Once she moves to one new location with you, it’s more natural to invite her back to your place. Bounce her first. That’s the best way to invite her up.

  • I wanna show you my <insert thing to check out, like guitar/aquarium/movie>. Just for a sec. Then I’m kicking you out.


  • Smell her hair and neck for like ten minutes without kissing or touching her. Creates massive sexual tension. (Credit: David DeAngelo)
  • Style’s “Evolutionary Phase Shift” Routine could work here too.
  • David DeAngelo’s “Two Steps Forward, One Step Back.”
    • Take two steps forward, and stop.
    • Continue where you left off, push the boundaries a little further, and stop.
    • Continue where you left off, push the boundaries a little further, and stop.
    • Until you get to sex.
  • Vin DiCarlo’s “Escalation Ladder.”
    • 1. After making out with her, kiss her neck and ears. These areas are immensely sensual for a woman.Here’s a cool move while you’re kissing her. Reach up her neck, grab a fistful of her hair and pull it from behind. Massive turn on for her. Probably has something to do with your dominance, and her submissiveness.
    • 2. Next, lift the back of her shirt up, and touch the skin of her back.
    • 3. Lift the front of her shirt up and the front of yours so the skin of your stomachs touch.
    • This is such a gorgeous moment. The first time your skins touch, it’s like ahhhhhhhhh. And it turns women on A LOT.4. Now you can start kissing her stomach and her sides, and slowly move up her body.Or lightly run your fingers down her body. Either way take your time and savor her body. Here’s some things you can do.
      • Take time to smell and enjoy how wonderful she smells. Isn’t the way women smell amazing? David DeAngelo once recommended just smelling a woman for 10 minutes straight without touching her. Creates FANTASTIC sexual tension.
      • Caress the parts of her skin where her clothes touch, like the skin next to her bra strap, or where her skin touches the top of her panties. Immensely sensitive.

      As Style says, the parts of the body that bend the most have the most nerve endings, and the parts you see the least are the most sensitive. So touch her, caress her, lick her, even bite her behind the elbow, behind the knee… you get the idea.

      • You can also take her shirt off and feel her tits here. But warning…

      …save kissing and feeling up her tits for LAST. And save sucking her nipples for ABSOLUTELY last. Kiss or lick around her nipples before kissing or licking her nipples. Most guys dive in for the nipples first. Distinguish yourself by saving them for last.

      5. After her shirt comes off, feel up her ass.

      Her pussy is now a step away.

      6. Stimulate her pussy from behind, rather than from her front.

      This is Vin’s genius idea. He points out every guy who goes for sex, moves in from the front, but it’s easy for her to resist. Moving in from her ass is unexpected. And damn effective.

      But don’t dive straight for her pussy. Start by touching the area around it first. Then you can start fingering her from behind. Once she starts panting and moaning…

      7. …finger her from the front. Take off her panties. Get her turned on so much that she’s begging for you to put it in.

      The only thing I would add to DiCarlo’s plan, is DeAngelo’s “two steps forward and one step back.” Escalation to sex doesn’t have to be this linear. Stop and smell the roses along the way. In fact, definitely do this. It feeds sexual tension, and her desire.

      8. Even though she’s begging for you to put it in, you don’t have to. In fact it’ll turn her on if you don’t yet. Penetrate her when you’re ready. And penetrate her inch by sweet tortuous inch, making her ache for your cock for however long you can control yourself.

      She’ll be so close to the edge of orgasm before you’ve entered her fully that by the time you slide your entire length of you cock inside her, it probably won’t be too hard for her to surrender to the drop.

      9. Put a pillow under her pelvis or lift her pelvis somehow.


      It makes it easier to hit her G-spot with your cock. Oh, and have plenty of condoms.

      10. While you’re in her, take the lead. Pull her hair. Suck her tits. Vary the strokes and speed–fast, hard and shallow, slow, soft, and deep. Stop and continue later. Talk to her. And most important of all, be PASSIONATE as all hell.

      11. Make sure she has an orgasm before you do.

      12. After you’ve both cum, hold her afterwards. Either share the silence or tell her how beautiful she is.

      “Afterglow” by Alonzo Adams

      Obviously, giving her great sex is a whole other topic. Where your opener was dominated by words spiced with kino, sex is dominated by kino spiced with words.

      But just as kino and words aren’t separate in the first step, they’re not separate in step seven. David Shade once said your most important tool isn’t your tool, it’s your voice. So, talk. Make sounds. Stimulating her mind as well as her body is one key to great sex.


      I know I’m beating a dead horse here…  but just pick six really quick, simple “gambits” for your attract phase to start.


      1. a reason for talking with her (i.e. an opener)
      2. a banter line joined with appreciation (do this IMMEDIATELY after your opener–within TWO sentences)
      3. a DHV (statement about–who you are)
      4. a qualifier (question about–who is she?)
      5. a statement of interest
      6. a way to isolate/close her.

      Practice each gambit five times to memorize it, five times in front of the mirror to get the delivery right, then five times out in the field. This will get the gambits into your bones. Then you can learn a new one, and go through the same process again.

      If you get to qualification with five different sets in one night, you’ve mastered the attract phase. Now you can move on to practicing comfort. Add three more routines that:

      1. creates an emotional connection
      2. kiss close
      3. extracts her to the seduction location

      Practice up until foreplay. Once you get to foreplay, study how to give women orgasms.

      Congrats. You’re a Casanova. Better than that, the going through this whole process will change your life. I know it did for me.

      And do me a favor. Let me know how it goes for you. Best of luck.

      Your Buddy,


8 thoughts on “My Routines Collection

  1. kaiserr

    good job man iv been more successful with women in a week than I was in 2 years!!! after reading this, I cant believe getting women was this easy damn if only I knew earlier anyway my only problem is texting a girl if she doesnt reply should I call her or forget about it?? if u have an article about texting please gve me the link thank you

    1. renaissan

      Thanks for the kind words man! You’re right, attracting women is actually not that hard, once you know what to do.

      As for texting:

      If she doesn’t reply, maybe text her one more time. Make the text fun and playful. See the article I wrote on texting for some ideas: She’ll be more apt to reply to a low pressure, fun text.

      But if she still doesn’t reply, let her go. As you know, there’s plenty of fish in the sea. It’s not your fault she doesn’t have a sense of humor. 😉

  2. Mr. A

    This is absolutely a GOLD mine. As a pirate, I am collecting my booty, one step at a time 🙂 can’t thank you enough for this post! I am starting at A1 however,
    for reference. I’ve been learning about game for about 5 years now. I’ve had to do tons of inner game and healing to get me to where I am now. Its amazing to be able to tell when a girl is attracted to you.

    Now that Rona is no longer crushing my GAME. Each day I’m learning, calibrating and growing. I’m going with the Jealous GF Opener and adding a pinch of qualifying while at it. For ex, my “friend” will give me hard time if I’m getting advice from an 18 year old. But, in talking to an 18 yrs old at Hollister that was throwing down serious IoIs the other day. Adding appreciation, as age, doesn’t represent everything. But whats more important is personality and addittude… BC, even though I’m 38, I’m going to game any girl that is legal. But, I’ll tell them that they are almost qualified to be my adopted kid sister, to give me perspective on my female situations. Still much work in progress. But, as I work on how to attract, I’ll have plenty of romantic options!

    Next, I’m going to learn the rings routine! It will go hand and hand with my amateur palm readings! Along with Strawberry fields and the cube… I’ll be able to DHV quite well. My biggest sticking point is banter. But, as I bring awareness into the now, or being present and be able to not think and be in a flow mindset. It will come with time! Hope you’re good with the lengthy post!

    Much love!

    1. renaissan

      Are you kidding? I appreciate the lengthy post! Shows thought and regard on your part.

      You’re absolutely right this is a goldmine and I’m not sure a lot know about it. I wanted to organize all my material in one place and then give it as a resource for other guys to help them on this awesome journey.

      Another reason I appreciate your post is because I had begun a Routines Manual. It included more material plus it gave techniques. But I took a hiatus to help publish my dad’s book. I hadn’t gotten back to it…until I read your comment. I have opened the doc back up, and thanks to your note, I’m inspired to complete it. So thanks for that.

      By the way, it’s great the pandemic is calming down, and I’m psyched you’re actually implementing this stuff. Implementation is key to success.

      But to go a step further, I’d argue the difference a good pickup artist and a great one is the great ones track their progress.

      (If you’d like, I included two trackers in his article: Tracker #2 is especially helpful. It’s the one I used when I was practicing pickup. Trackers helped me reflect on an approach and gave me awareness of what went well and not so well. This helped me improve. They also kept me disciplined, too.)

      “Jealous Girlfriend” is a great opener because it naturally leads into a conversation. (I would suggest “The Cube” and “Strawberry Fields” for when you’re one-on-one because they’re even longer. Plus they’re great more for rapport building rather than for opening.)

      Great self-awareness on your part about the banter sticking point. It’s funny because you mentioned “kid sister.” Sounds like you’re…teasing? Lo and behold that IS banter!

      I would definitely pick a banter line from this post and use it in conjunction with “Jealous Girlfriend.” Banter is no big deal. Just think of it as adding humor, play-fighting (or teasing) and positive energy to the interaction. It also creates sexual tension. It is CRITICAL to building intrigue (or attraction).

      I’d suggest the banter line be the second sentence out of your mouth, especially if you’re doing a lot of approaches. (A more “sincere” approach without the banter works great. But this only works if you are in fact sincere, i.e., you’ve met a woman you are absolutely smitten with. It’s difficult to do this kind of “sincere” approach if you’re doing ten approaches per night.)

      Thanks for this awesome comment Mr. A. It’s encouraging, inspiring and makes my day. Keep up the great work.


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